hey everyone. My marriage is tanking, I see the mistakes i've made, she's made some too, It's not getting better. I just want to cuddle and spend time and watch netflix without sex. To me that's crossing the line. I'm lonely, but I love her and for a host of reasons I can't leave her. I just want an escape if that makes any sense.
@Bruce's Everything you said made sense to me,except your use of the word 'can' in your last sentence. I think you must have meant 'can't'.
@Proudgamer I am glad to see more poly folk here, and I agree with what you said.
@docgatorb I totally laughed out loud at your Mandela effect comment. I am wondering how many people here even know what that is.
@chococuddles What will your gf say when she reads what you wrote here about the cupcakes? Now that is cheating.
Jim
I am a professional cuddler and I don't judge someone by if they're married, or dating someone seriously, or not.
Massage therapists see clients at least near-naked, and they certainly don't care about the marital status of their clients; they're there to provide a therapy. Same for me.
If a married client feels he needs to clear seeing me with his wife, that is certainly his prerogative. However, as she is not my client, and my client may feel freer and more relaxed without anyone else present, only he and I would be in the session space. It's difficult-to-impossible to have the type of oxytocin-releasing experience, melty type of cuddle that you're going for when a third party is present in the room.
A Pro who declines someone due to relationship status (or race, age, height, etc for that matter) isn't a Pro in my book.
There are definitely instances when a Pro should decline a potential client but the above shouldn't be among them.
As a pro the only things I judge are those that would be a red flag to meet the person in the first place. Such as do they seem like because of their messages unwilling to follow the client agreement.
I don't judge any other lifestyle choices, though sometimes during sessions I'm asked for dating advice or relationship advice which I'll give my perspective on. It's like a barber or masseuse, the client may end up talking a lot about their personal things or not talking at all. I like to treat each client with respect and let them use the session to air or not air any feelings they may be having. A bit like therapy.