My favorite thing is when I want to go read a profile of someone on a thread and I start getting messages from pros in like California asking if I want to do a virtual session. Which hey make your money. But can’t say that’s where I want to spend my doe.
People seem to like to cuddle with me and I know looks wise I'm not everyone's cup of tea so there's that...
My cup of tea...
@pmvines' cup of tea...
I'd still ting and "cheers", mate! 😅
~ Sunset Snuggles
I do like flamingos but your cup is way nicer @SunsetSnuggles
I don't think looks matter. I value good hygiene & respect. & More often than not I do like to know who to expect when I show up for a first time cuddle because it definitely does make me feel more secure. What determines if I meet with someone is whether or not I get the impression I will feel safe and won't be put in difficult situations
@SunsetSnuggles there’s no tea in those cups, brah!!
For an enthusiast, if they are attractive, it’s nice, not going to lie. So it is somewhat of a factor for me. But I’m mainly looking for someone kind, is female, good hygiene.
For professionals, looks matter to me more, since I’m shelling out the cash, and there are so many professionals, I’m going to select someone who I find attractive. Especially since there isn’t much time to form a connection, what draws me to someone I know nothing about? Well their looks. Of course, with repeated sessions with the same professional you still end up forming a connection. But with enthusiasts, generally you try to form a connection before the first cuddle, while with a professional this is generally not the case. I don’t blame professionals at an all, there isn’t the time for them to make friends with every single client.
(Where can I find these survey results?)
First off, My response is based upon taking the question AT FACE VALUE. —Nothing more. Nothing less.
(I am not taking into consideration other important aspects as to how wonderful someone’s profile is, what kind of vibe you had messaging, the conversations and meeting, if any, that transpired before it, and one’s general feeling of that person. I am sticking straight to the question of do looks matter yes or no.)
Short answer: yes.
More protracted version:
***Even though this is all under the umbrella of being platonic / non-sexual***** - looks still DO matter to me.
Allow me to unpack that: PLATONIC cuddling is STILL a very intimate act, no matter how you slice it. And if I am going to share that physical space, level of energy, warmth, affection and all around good joojoo with someone on my gluten-free couch, I want to, at minimum, have summmmm baseline modicum level of attraction to that person. I want to WANT to be close to that person.
My karma reviews all attest to my gentlemanly like conduct, but part of what makes me “ME”, and my cuddles as nice as they are (shameless plug lol) are all of those components mentioned; they all constitute that wonderful, magical elixir we call CHEMISTRY.
-Marc
Post Script: and yes, I will message a woman who does not have a photo. There are a variety of reasons people don’t want to put too much online, me being one of them…. initially. I put a lot of time and thought into putting my best foot forward in my profile, and I appreciate the same from others….
@WestsideMarc - The survey is in the 1st post on page 1 of this thread.
This is a fascinating topic. Thanks @TheNotoriousHUG for starting this thread and poll. I answered that appearance is "somewhat important." I'd like to be such a fantastic person that I could say it doesn't matter at all, but that wouldn't be true.
Please note that I'm coming from the perspective as someone who has hired professionals; that's my only experience in the cuddling world thus far.
As @WestsideMarc put it, cuddling (even when completely platonic) involves a level of intimacy. And for it to be a rewarding experience, I have to feel comfortable with that intimacy. I don't seek out men for cuddles for this same reason -- I wouldn't feel comfortable.
So I have to have a basic level of attraction to want to be intimate -- even in a platonic, non-sexual way -- with the other person. They don't have to be a supermodel, don't have to be 25 years younger than me, don't have to be the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. But some basic level of attraction needs to be there. And I'm not likely to have that level of attraction for men, or for women significantly older than myself, or for women who are notably larger than me. I'm not going to be comfortable cuddling with someone if I find them unattractive.
I'm a little embarrassed to admit all of that, because again -- I'd like to say that appearance doesn't matter in the slightest, that "what's inside" is all I ever pay attention to. But that's simply not true, and as human beings living in a specific society, we're conditioned to prefer certain facial features and certain body types. Those preferences have been ingrained into me over nearly five decades of life and they are not easily overcome.
For other, non-intimate services? Appearance doesn't matter in the slightest. I wouldn't pick a doctor, a plumber, a hairdresser, a mechanic, an employee based on what they look like. But for someone who's going to get in a bed with me, wrap their limbs around me, play with my hair, etc., etc.? Yes, a basic level of attraction makes the experience more pleasant, and I think most people (if they're being totally honest) would agree.
I don't look for appearances, just hygiene.
How do people feel about shirtless photos and photos with fish? I feel like some guys really need know the answer to that question.
Appearance doesn't have to be a plus, just NOT a minus for your experience. We're all drawn to different-looking people, as well as the opposite: some people's appearance can be off-putting (through no fault of their own, while looking perfectly fine to someone else). I love the diversity of the appearance of those I've cuddled with. i think some people call it "vibe," but any appearance works as long as you're able to let go and get all-the-way comfortable for your cuddle. If either party's appearance prevents that, then maybe find someone else?
@MrKinder and @WiserGuy3000 beautifully said. You both echoed/elaborated on my exact sentiments.
And it’s sad that women even have to comment on hygiene here. I mean, guys, if you are having a lady friend come over, no onions or garlic that day, take a frigging shower, and brush, floss and scope for Christ sake! Even though it’s not a “date”, prep for it the same. Isn’t this a given???
I think it matters quite a bit because hygiene can sometimes come through in a photo. Not always, some are good at hiding it. But generally, I can see if someone looks dirty in their photo.
@WestsideMarc You said "scope" and my medical background immediately went DANG, this guy seriously preps well! 🤣
As a client, I have no issue providing a current picture of myself, when reaching out to a provider. From a client perspective, seeing a photo of the provider in advance makes a first meeting easier.
It’s somewhat ironic that hygiene is so important, because if you’re exchanging money for a cuddle session, money happens to be a fomite, which, in other words can be very dirty. Lol 😂
@SunsetSnuggles Good one. (It sounded more elegant than mouthwash but the context you mentioned would’ve been a whole different website! Lol.)
@WestsideMarc Yeahhh, not so elegant. 👈🏻🤣
I answered the survey with "looks are very important." Count me in with @WestsideMarc and @WiserGuy3000. I don't subscribe to the theory that "since this is platonic, physicality doesn't matter in the slightest." I'm more in line with what WiserGuy3000 said: this is still an "intimate" activity, and even if there are no plans to have "sex," enjoyment comes from being "intimate" with someone you have some physical chemistry with.
I met a potential cuddler here who said she "didn't care what a guy looks like," but admitted that she desired someone bigger so she could have that "protected" feeling. I'm guessing that many, if not close to all, women share that preference. That qualifies as "physical preference." You, a woman, are compelled by thousands of years of evolution, to be more intimate with men who give you a certain feeling, just as I'm compelled by that same process.
You can, of course, go against that ingrained preference, but that doesn't mean it doesn't exist.
Further evidence that looks matter: many pro cuddlers post sexy photos in their profiles. And many enthusiasts, who can afford to be pickier than pros, put strict age ranges in their profiles. Does anyone really doubt that if a female enthusiast receives dozens or hundreds of invitations, if she's choosing at all, she takes looks into account as a major factor in her decision? (Along with personality and other things that we all care about, like friendly personality and hygiene.)
Yes it’s important but not the most decisive factor.
@FitSmartCuddler exaclty.
I voted appearance is somewhat important. I don't want to meet someone that looks wet behind the ears or looks like a thug. I don't want to meet someone who is shirtless or holding a fish. I extra puzzled by men whose profile pic is of them with what they caught fishing. That suggests a one-dimensional person to me. Actually showing your torso in any way suggests one-dimensional to me too. I'm way fine with being judged by my appearance. It helps with weeding out the shallow people. Good thread.
@achetocuddle lol 😂
@lonelytauros LOL, yeah, like that.
There are two theories behind the fish. One is that men are proud of their catch and think it sends a primal message to women about their ability to provide food. And it very well may. The other is that men rarely take pictures of themselves unless they are photographing their catch. So it's the only picture they have.
The other is that men rarely take pictures of themselves unless they are photographing their catch
This is it 100%. I don't fish, so the fish picture thing isn't something I'm susceptible to, but when I scroll through my camera roll for pictures of myself from the last year, I have a couple gym selfies, a few selfies with women, and... that's about it. If I were to make a dating site profile right now it'd be pretty slim pickings.
The other is that men rarely take pictures of themselves
The dick pics are coming from somewhere bud.
I suspect the fish pics simply stem from a desire to show off their hobby. Some guys really like to fish. :-)
I like the mentioning of hygiene, freshly showered, deodorant, minty fresh breath is all very important...Especially while cuddled up close together. I will say good hygiene is more of a plus to me than physical attraction. 😊