Agreed! I cannot tell you how many guys STILL try to take it further than just cuddles even though I state on my page that it's NOT for anything sexual in nature AND when we text or chat prior to any session they STILL take it there or try to, EVEN in virtual cuddle sessions. I've had to shut down many of them. Some also are using it like it's a dating site, I literally JUST had to tell someone no to these exact things and then refer him to some online dating sites! It's relentless and sad. Like come on.
Cuddling is extremely satisfying and soul healing, in my opinion, it's amazing and truly livens the soul when in a down mood or feeling bad, JUST CUDDLING: it's incredible!!!
@RozByAnothrNaym I sure hope you are reporting anyone pushing boundaries. The very worst thing you can do is give them a decent Karma review then you're just unleashing them to the rest of the world.
This is why I typically don’t have repeat clients. I genuinely do it for the cuddles. I listen to people talk and vent. Me being a friend tends to make them think they can get handsy and go further. I’ve had to shut things down. I’m very picky with who I cuddle with which is why I don’t cuddle very often.
My neighbor's diary says I don't respect boundaries.
@gem7 Tell your neighbor to keep their nose in their own business. Gosh!
~ Sunset Snuggles
🫂 Enthusiast 🌄 Travel Junkie 📸 Shutter Bug
Wow,
How upsetting it is to hear and see the lack of respect and compassion for those of us who genuinely enjoy the coddle community just for what it is. Simply platonic cuddles 🤗 I am sorry that you lost the opportunity of meeting a potentially kind cuddler @Melancholy
Very sorry about your bad experience with an aggressive cuddle customer that refused to let you leave after informing him he was violating your space, safety and comfort that way. You truly did not deserve that and nothing you did was your fault. Some people make poor and selfish decisions that everyone else has to be affected by and deal with the aftermath of. @MTex P.S. the Bear spray does sound quite helpful, I may even invest in picking a couple of them up.
~ Happy Cuddling Everyone 🤗 ~
What @jaclyn924 said 🙌🏾🙌🏾🙌🏾
@SouthernDoll Thank you. I agree platonic cuddles is what we are here for & we should be able to enjoy them in a safe space. 🫶🏼
I often worry when I see people advise female cuddlers to "just get up and leave" ... what if he won't let you? You have no idea who this person is or what he may have done in the past. Even if he seems harmless in your public meeting ... so did Ted Bundy.
This.
And why I want to slap every fool who whines at me in my DMs for having “too many rules.” Bros, I’ve worked in military law enforcement, as a victim advocate in the civilian legal system, and as a psychotherapist with sex offenders. I’ve seen and heard things —committed by people no one would suspect of doing so — that make many true crime documentaries look like Disney movies. Anyone who is so clueless that they can’t, or won’t, understand the inherent risk of meeting strangers on the internet and why it’s totally reasonable for women to want a photo of your driver’s license, to only meet in public, or any other totally justified safety rule is not someone I want around me.
I concur with the OP — as well as the other comments that the bad actors aren’t going to change. Most of them lack empathy and a conscience and are entitled, so it doesn’t matter what we say, they aren’t going to change or even care. Even if they end up in prison for what they’ve done, somehow they’ll perform enough mental gymnastics to make themselves into the victim and take zero accountability for the harms they’re causing. Welcome to the world of the Cluster B personality types.
@TheMidnightOwl thank you for mentioning getting a picture of their ID or at least sharing it. There are women I talk to on other friends sites and because of what some people have told me in general as well as what I’ve read on here I make sure I tell people to not engage or meet unless they get a ID picture or something. Also, thanks for giving me something new to look up, Cluster B personality types.
@MTex I’m sorry to hear about what happened. I was gonna say maybe get a taser as well but that anybody has to think of a defensive weapon for just cuddles. I have a friend that used to do pro cuddles and I would tell her to get a picture of the ID of the person and also tell a friend that you’re gonna cuddle. If they don’t hear from you or something you’re covered. It’s a shame that enthusiast has to do that as well.
@Bear I always send the info about my cuddle to a safety person, and have scheduled check-in times.
@TheFunCartel - You bring out the best in all of us somehow!
@SunsetSnuggles glad you’re staying safe.
@Bear Thank you. I did all that & still wasn't able to prevent the assault. I had a picture of his ID. I notified someone of where I was & what times.
I learned a lesson that when someone says something to you believe them. He told me that when he gets to hold me he won't let me go & that's exactly what happened.
@MTex i hope the ID helps nail his a$$
@Bear Thank you. I hope everyone keeps taking measures to stay safe! And hopefully these horror stories help others to see red flags ahead of time.
ID pictures don't have much safety value, because they are easy to fake. That's probably why I haven't been asked yet. There are lots of other smart safety precautions.
Most guys cannot chase you after a kick to the groin. You won't even need to run.
Or a poke ot the eyes, hurts like hell, sends a shock to the brain.
Reported for duplicate post, reviewed, and removed. This post was not appropriate for this thread and topic. [-Sid]
I was sexually assaulted by my last cuddling client. Thought they understood the rules but nope. Piece of filth. And worse.
I'm so sorry lovely. @CuddlesWithCat please tell me you reported that member
@CuddlesWithCat I am so sorry! I was also assaulted. I reported him & he was banned. I hope you are getting the help you need to care for yourself. Please know you are not alone.
For a person like that it doesn't matter what we spell out literally or verbally speak to them they don't respect boundaries. I feel like I walked into a trap. What I wanted was of no consequence to him. He already had an agenda from the start. I hate that people like that are preying on others.
no racial generalizations - Stormy
Omg reading that gave me PTSD with the ear thing. It made my whole body shutter. The tongue in the ear is so gross! 🤢 I'm glad you are healing. 🫶🏼
Hmm. I may have a couple of suggestions, re self-defense-wise, to offer. Let me mull this over, but it'd be good to find a solution for at least part of this problem.
.
@Auroradream & @jaclyn924 Yes, I reported, he's now banned and the others surprisingly deleted their own accounts, so, I suppose the trash took itself out?🤷🏻♀️ @jaclyn924 yes, this is why I do not have a lot of cuddles either. I noticed when I put all of that on my page, the messages dried up. There are a couple women on here that I legit think could not possibly be doing anything other than amazing cuddle sessions, but then I read this thread and am just shocked at the possibility that this woman who seems as though she's very much like the "girl next door" could potentially be doing more than cuddles? 🤔 Really? Like some cases on here have just blown my mind! It's a tad disheartening
@RozByAnothrNaym Probably deleted their accounts before they could be banned so they can come back under other names.
On a related note, if someone breaks the rules and then deletes their account, there is a time window where mods can still ban them. While they can't be reported directly through the reporting system, we encourage members to contact a moderator if there is concern about rule-breaking behavior.
The more information we have, the easier it is to deal with issues that need to be dealt with.
I enjoy and appreciate these posts about people respecting boundaries. Welcome to the daily wishes of most minorities in this country. Just my opinion as an African American male who can empathize but rarely voice ant type of complaint and have society be empathetic.