I tried to see if there was a thread on this already and if someone knows, please point me there.
I'm new, have had just one cuddle, which was lovely. I've been doing a lot of corresponding and feel good about my screening skills, but some of the things I hear on here give me the willies.
I just reported someone with a screenshot of our exchange and he got banned immediately (thank you - it's nice for a woman to feel that kind immediate protection). I'm writing here for a bit of support and company with it, and also to model it because my sense is people may sometimes be afraid to report. I felt a duty to for others who might have a harder time drawing the boundary and for whatever harm he might do with his sloppy boundaries in the future. It sounded like he had had multiple experiences of things going sexual with women and that he felt that it was "only fair" to respond if that's what they wanted. He was preparing me to know that that was on the table should I be interested. I immediately reported him without responding, though it wasn't a pleasant experience to report someone at all, never mind someone who has been on the site longer than me.
I get the feeling that there are a few different types of folks on here, including the career cuddlers (not pro) who just get the platonic thing, and then those who hope it goes sexual, and those who are actually actively seeking for it to go that way. I'm curious how much that is happening, and what the boundary is. As long as someone isn't soliciting that, or covertly or overtly pushing things that way in person, what's the line between inappropriately going sexual and consensually going sexual? Is it just a conversation, hey, looks like we're attracted to each other, shall we take this to another level? I feel unsafe in any case feeling like someone is going to meet up with me hoping it will turn sexual and relying on me to hold the whole thing rather than mutually holding it.
Would appreciate comments from anyone who is moved to share their experience or input.