I fully support all the minority groups that are struggling for acceptance. This struggle is totally unnecessary as all humans should be accepted for who they are.
" Cmon people now, smile on your brother, everybody get together, try to love one another right now".
The Youngbloods
@CuddlesByGracie: The Genderbread Person! I remember the first time I saw that. It was version 2.0, and I was delighted. You're right, it's a very good starting place. Thank you!
Wonderful thread. It’s wonderful to see all the support!! 🏳️⚧️
I dislike the term support because it makes whatever group sound weak. I think all anyone wants regardless of race, gender or whatever characteristics you wish to offer is to be treated just like everyone else and respected.
This is why I do not discriminate and respectfully flip off all a-hole drivers during rush hour traffic.
@FunCartel but the problem is we're not being treated just like everyone else and we're not being respected. Until we are, we need allies to support us so we're not the only ones fighting for a shred of respect.
@desi_babe I don’t disagree. There is the fight and then there is the end goal. I was stating the end goal. But the fight applies to any group that is marginalized and made to feel less than. But I like the term fight because that is positive action against hate. The word support and why it is a weak term was best illustrated by the late Harold Ramis in Stripes when he spoke about support:
“if we ever get into really heavy combat... I'll be right behind you guys. Every step of the way.”
I fight. Fighting can be caustic or it can be educational, but make no mistake that I fight. I find it too easy for people to say “I support you” then when called to action to say “I am busy.” I prefer action to semantics.
@desi_babe
There's a saying I read somewhere once: "The character for human [人] is made by supporting each other."
That's one of the things about being a social species—we all depend on one another more than most of us are probably aware of. When those supports are lacking (or reversed), we notice!
The strongest army in the world still marches on its stomach... and occasionally needs some moral support, too.
@FunCartel
I appreciate your preference for direct action. There's nothing wrong with moral support (in fact threads like this one give me a boost), but they wouldn't be good for much if fighting for equality and respect were banned.
@DaringSprinter well said! The strongest army in the world…yes! All needing support or someone to stand by them, agreed that doesn’t imply weakness. We all need each other in different ways. At different times.
Full support to all cuddle friends regardless of orientation, how they identify or anything related to being different. I fully accept and welcome all!
I think everyone is overthinking my point. The term support is in many ways an omnipotent word easily proffered but rarely tested. I know people who support every cause in the world, but when offered an opportunity to intervene when oppression is occurring in front of them, do nothing for whatever reason—usually because it wasn’t convenient for them in the moment. Nothing wrong with reaping spiritual sustenance from threads like this, and yes it is support, and I agree with it. I just don’t like the word because everyone says they support but so few act on it. It is a crutch word. Offering a shoulder, saying I see you for the human you are, and signing petitions are passive support. Active support can involve sacrifice and is more akin to a fight. I lost a friend over a family friend who was transitioning and a hospital with a big donor who was anti-trans halted treatments. I called someone I have known for years who is a department head doctor and tried to convince her to influence the board. She wouldn’t even broach the subject with them because “that is a touchy subject. I could lose my position and get nothing in return.” I haven’t spoken to her since then and believe me, we were very close and it hurt. But she wouldn’t try.
The family friend found a place but it wasn’t as convenient or as affordable as the original hospital. The hospital that did the treatments was an hour away. If he had only needed a nose job or braces he could’ve gone down the street. She now is a working graphics artist and a photographer with several works in several galleries.
Support is great until you are asked to do something uncomfortable. That support often melts away when that occurs.
@FunCartel: It's true. Moral support is cheap... and too often confused with more expensive forms of support, as though giving the cheap one means you're offering (or have already given) the expensive one.
I try not to see moral support as an offer of any more solid support. It's just, well, words that are nice to hear. Sometimes you need that.
@FunCartel I see your point! Thanks for clarifying.
@Vkashi Welcome!
I have cuddled with a transgender, male to female, and it was no different than any other cuddle experience I have had. And we had two hours of great conversation on so many topics.
.
@Saysoh: Your post has baffled me. What in the name of clarity are you trying to say?
A psychiatrist from Harvard University coined the term to describe the insults and dismissals which he regularly witnessed non-black Americans inflicting on African Americans—and yes, this was in 1970.
He wasn't pushing a narrative on anybody, with or without "a real world skill set." He was just describing a phenomenon.
Which existed even without the word he came up with to describe it.
Of course, having a word for a thing makes the thing easier to talk about: so it's not surprising that people started talking more about the insults and dismissals suffered by members of other marginalized groups, once they had a word for it. "Tangents and disconnects," you say? I don't see it.
Where universities come into it I don't know, unless it's that you tend to learn things at universities, including words for things you never had words for before (but which existed all the same).
And then you say you don't understand why it's possible to get a degree in gender studies—well, I don't understand why it's possible to get a degree in art history, but there it is all the same and I assume somebody must be getting some good out of it even if I don't know what it is. Gender studies at least has the benefit of giving us advocates for victims of domestic violence and coordinators for women's health clinics and so on.
To me, your comment seems a bit like a poorly thought out spiderweb itself: tangled and confusing. What is your point?
Edit: Ah, I see it's been deleted while I was typing. So... no point, then. All right, carry on. I guess.
Thank you @MonkeyNeedsAHug. I appreciate you sharing resources. I also appreciate the momentum of this community affirming support, love, connection, comfort and most all cuddles for our trans members! ✊
@Jkay
Preach! ✊
Looks like a good time to send up the bat signal, again.
I would respectfully disagree. Within the past 40 minutes 2 threads on sexual orientation and asking if someone is trans have been (appropriately) locked by the mods.
Instead of reviving a related, 13 month old thread right now, maybe it is time to give this subject a rest, at least until the mods have had a chance to sort out appropriate consequences to people who led to the other threads getting locked this morning.
That is my only comment. I will not be posting anything additional in this thread.
@JohnR1972 - This is a support thread. I don't see any disrespect here, and to be fair, he commented in this thread before the other ones were locked.
Fair warning, but there will be consequences to the prior closed threads.
I don't have many expectations in life other than wishing people weren't dicks. But here we are.
@Shake49 and @netrunner will review and dole it out appropriately. Sorry not sorry. Know that if it was me doing the doling, certain folks would need an ER visit to find their keyboard.
I see you. And I’m glad you’re here.
@MonkeyNeedsAHug Well put. Exclusion and condemnation is unkind, thoughtless, and selfish. I love the diversity.
Both of my sons most important long term relationships have been with trans people . I am happy that he is open and accepting and loves the person for who they are, and not how they identify .
Hugs and support
I'm not sure how/why this is a topic even being discussed. The reality is that if you're "trans", your muscle tone and body structure will tell on you to whomever you're cuddling. There's literally no point in hiding it. It's not something to draw attention to or be ashamed of. It just is what it is.
Removed the part that is particularly provocative. Debate is fine here but let's try and avoid causing disruption. - Mark
Wut? 👆🏽
@MonkeyNeedsAHug I agree with you that “wut?”