@sillysassy Guilty as charged.
You are definitely not the enthusiast I was referring to. The one I was referring to never got to the cuddling stage. We just had drinks to meet first and that was it. You will always be on Mt Rushmore like I said before.
Hahahhaha @FunCartel The idea of a tree trimmer for the noses still gets me every time!!!
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Sorry OP for derailing your thread. Back to your regularly scheduled program. 😊
UNSPOKEN EXPECTATIONS seldom work out in any situation. Like @cudbud64 said
I'm sure there is risk of feelings on one side of things at any point, but that is when two grown adults sit down and talk about it
@StructuredQueryLanguage I think you answered this for yourself. You can’t control what other people feel or expect but if you are in a place that you aren’t able to be your authentic self then you should stick with a pro until you get all of your own heart and mind settled.
I'd be so worried about expectations of other kinds of reciprocity unless the cuddling is super symmetrical. I'd probably actually be overly-giving out of politeness if I were cuddling with an enthusiast
ummmm... is it better to get a paid massage or a free massage? is it better to pay for a meal or get a free meal?
@Baby_ Depends on the quality of the massage and meal. Free doesn’t mean good.
Depends what type of free meal .
If its fresh why not, if its in a bag thats been sitting in the sun.. no gracias muito obrigado
It’s better to pay for the cuddle. The way I see it not only are you paying for the pro to come and cuddle but you’re also paying for the pro to leave afterwards.
I know I’m biased, but I think it really boils down to what you need. If you just need a body to hug and someone to talk to and can access an enthusiast who you get a long with, free, cuddles might be able to fulfill your needs. If you need lots of nurturing and emotional support and want to feel taken care of going with a reputable cuddle therapist is the way to go.
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It depends, as well, on your personal thoughts and feelings about transactional relationships.
I think maybe hiring a pro takes away a little bit of that fear of rejection that a lot of people feel.
@Kuddle6
Admittedly, that’s a valid point of view I hadn’t considered.
My relationship with rejection became comfortable way back in my early teens.
At this point in my life I have no fear of rejection, and actually see it as the good thing that it is.
I’m not most people’s cup of tea, and as long as everyone is being honest and kind about things, I far prefer a “No” to a “Well, maybe if we can change each other it will work.”
Either, and, or... I think what matters is that someone gets their needs met. If you want to go the enthusiasts route nothing wrong with that. If you want to go the pros route also nothing wrong.
It's better to cuddle, period. Just because you pay it doesn't 100% guarantee things won't get awkward or feelings could occur but if that works for you then its all good. If both parties have the right platonic intent (I do) then it won't be an issue. I would much rather get free cuddles with no set time limit.
@Joe82_ This seems to be what many men want. Not just on this site. Easy happy cuddles without having to commit to more. Payment is in place of that. They want to keep their lives simple with no drama. They want to be pampered with no obligations attached. I understand and respect that need,
I generally prefer cuddling with professionals. My life is very full. My circle of important people is large and I have complex family (and extended family) relationships. I don’t have the spoons to start a new relationship or friendship, but I still have some unmet touch/intimacy needs.
I have cuddled with a few enthusiasts, and I found the “cuddle courtship” that is required to actually meet and cuddle a non-pro enthusiast to be too onerous for me and my situation.
Depends on the person
I have yet to cuddle with an enthusiast, but here is my thought; cuddling with a professional cuddler. I am paying for professionalism to meet my platonic touch needs; If and when I decide to cuddle with another enthusiast, the cuddling will be about the both of us instead of just being about me. Many people find it hard to understand that intimate platonic relationships can and do work. I need to keep my life as simple as possible with no drama. I like the pampering of consensual platonic cuddling with no obligations attached.
Personally, I prefer cuddling with enthusiasts rather than pros. Introduction of payment invariably changed the interpersonal dynamic. Some pros manage this very deftly, while others not so much. There is a very very wide variability in the standards of range of professionalism one can encounter on this site. Some pros are amazing and set a very high standard; they almost warrant a different designation akin to “super host” on AirBnB. At the same time, they are other “pros” here who are essentially enthusiasts who suddenly want realized they could get paid; many have given very little thought to what it means to be “professional.” But, either way, I prefer to meet with other enthusiasts where there is a sort of “mutuality” that the pro arrangement (almost always) manages to remove. I don’t want to be a client. I want to be the person cuddling you and who you are cuddling. It might just be a nuance, but for me it makes a difference. To each their own. 🙂
I’ve never paid for a cuddle; it’s just not my thing. But I do think about the sheer ease and time efficiency of using a pro sometimes:
Despite living in gigantic Los Angeles with only 10,000,000 people, frequently being complimented on my profile and karmas, and writing quality, well written introduction messages I would say, without exaggeration, I have to reach out to 100 women just to get one actual meet in person.
The high majority of those organic experiences have been great, but such as life there are always horror stories too, but with a pro (I’m guessing) you pretty much know exactly what to expect and there’s going to be an instant response and highly probable meet.
It’s not a money issue for me. At all. Personally it’s just so hard to get past the concept of paying someone to cuddle. I know it’s a simple paid service just like anything else, I get it, but I just think if anyone should get paid for a cuddle it should be ME! I’m t-h-a-t wonderful! …….Playful confidence aside…….I may do it one day. It would certainly save me endless hours of unanswered introductions, looking at blank profiles, and messages that can’t seem to get past one sentence replies…
It is a sticking point with me. Arggghh…
I have realized that the only way I am going to get physical touch or emotional regard from somebody is to pay for it. Not complaining just accepting reality and realizing and accepting my limitations when it comes to dating. If I didn’t make a good living my touch starvation would quite simply never be resolved.
@Spud424 🫂🫂
I originally joined this site because I was intrigued with the idea of paying somebody to cuddle them. The pros made it possible for any guy to get cuddles. I don't make a whole lot at my regular job, but I can make enough for a session delivering food for Grubhub for a weekend.
I don't do paid cuddling. For me, a large part of "social sharing" is knowing the other person enjoys my company because of who I am and not because I'm paying them. Yes, I'm sure some pro cuddlers can be very warm and friendly and cuddly but I have no way of knowing how much of it is an act, any more than I know a waitress is being smiley and friendly because she knows it's likely to result in a bigger tip. I do know that if I wasn't paying, she wouldn't give me the time of day, which makes it totally transactional. But finding an enthusiast is next to impossible, so as to the question: "Which one is better?" my answer is "Neither really works for me." But if you're a different type of person, and you feel you're getting something you need by paying, then I wish you the best.
@WestsideMarc Try thinking about it like this:
Pro cuddlers aren’t paid for cuddling, but rather they are paid for their time. The cuddling comes free of charge. The time they spend with you or anyone is time that they are not able to do something else for employment, so to compensate them for it they request payment.
I hope this is helpful.
@FitSmartCuddler I wanted to say thank you for your comment because it actually made me reevaluate what I’m doing here. it’s a tough spot to be in when you want to cuddle but you can’t find an enthusiast 99% don’t respond and the ones that do are just not interested. If they do respond the first thing they’ll ask me for is my picture and when I send it it’s like I never hear back from them so it’s kind of sad because it’s like they don’t even want to give a chance to know me.
And then for the pros that I’ve cuddled with yes I’ve gotten some good karma how much of it is genuine I don’t really know I would like to think most of it is but who can really tell and the funny thing is is most of the enthusiast don’t even look at my profile and if they did, and if they did read my karma it’s like it doesn’t make a difference because as soon as they see my picture They don’t respond and yeah they’re not obligated to but it all seems superficial at that point.
Will I still continue to pay pros to cuddle with maybe probably I guess it just depends on how lonely I get.
I’m beginning to wonder if some of these female “enthusiasts “ are not accounts. I’ve noticed an influx of accounts lately 0 of which reply to introductions. Kinda suspicious 🤨
Knowing that somebody just wants to be with me without it being a transaction agreement would have a greater value than money can buy, but it's very difficult especially since men outnumber women on this site. The pros on this site makes it possible for any guy to receive cuddles.
@Mike403 I agree with you and I would think that’s the goal for most guys on here. I would love to cuddle with someone that genuinely wants to cuddle with me kind of like that Cheap Trick song I want you to want me but for now I’ll go the route of the pro because it’s much easier to get cuddles that way.