I'm new to this and I need help figuring out what I should do.

HealingSystemHealingSystem
in General

Hey there. My name is Mike, I'm 21 years old, and I'm blind. I figured out how to navigate the website, which is great! Because that's half the battle right there.
I'm just not really sure how to start things out. Because I'm new to all of this. I'm very touch starved, and I'm embarrassed about it. But I finally decided to give this website a try, because I didn't really know what else to do.
I just don't even really know where to begin. what am I supposed to do? Do I just message random people? What do I even say? Or do I wait for someone to message me? I don't really know how this works, and I don't really know the etiquette for these types of things. I don't want to accidentally come across as creepy or anything, that's not my intention at all. So I wanna make sure that I'm saying the right things, and doing the right things.
I don't really pick up on social cues that well, that's just something that I've never been taught.
If anyone can help me out, that would be great. What do you guys normally do?

Comments

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod
    edited September 2024

    Welcome and well done for coming here. From reading your post, my feeling is that you are going to be fine. You are not the first blind cuddler on these forums.

    You may find the following threads generally helpful about how this place works:

  • HealingSystemHealingSystem

    Also, will I get notifications for comments on the discussion?

  • CuddleDuncanCuddleDuncan Mod

    Go to Profile then Settings then Notifications and set the options you want.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @HealingSystem
    Welcome to the site! I'm proud of you for coming here, despite your insecurities about this type of site. I can assure you that it can be a wonderful place with genuine, caring people! There are also sex workers and scammers, so be careful with your money.

    You can use the search function to look for cuddlers in your area. Make sure you choose the Last Online: Less Than a Week Ago option, to ensure you are getting active cuddlers.

    You are certainly encouraged to reach out, since most women here don't send the first message. Just introduce yourself and make a polite comment about their profile, and try to get to know them.

    Many will not respond. This is not personal, it happens to everyone. Keep trying, be patient, and I truly hope you experience some beautiful cuddles!

    Another recommendation is to search for group cuddles on sites like MeetUp or Eventbrite. They often start off talking about boundaries and consent, and are a wonderful starting point. 😊

    If I'm ever in your area, I'd love to get to know you and potentially meet up!

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🫂 Enthusiast 🌄 Travel Junkie 📸 Shutter Bug

  • HealingSystemHealingSystem

    @CuddleDuncan I just wanted to figure out how to tag people on here, hopefully this works.

  • HealingSystemHealingSystem

    @SunsetSnuggles thank you for reaching out. I think what will be the biggest issue, is me getting discouraged from the lack of responses. I understand that it happens, I really do. But that's kind of why I have given up on those dating apps, and other stuff like that, because I would never get responses. And it always discouraged me. I'm not really sure how to not let that happen to me, I don't know how to not get stuck in that loop of thinking "why am I doing this if nobody's going to talk to me, I don't wanna waste my time with this". I don't wanna get caught in that line of thinking again.

  • Savi_LunaSavi_Luna
    edited September 2024

    Your message, though very kind, is pro advertising, which needs to be limited to the pro requests section of the forum. Thank you for your understanding. -JoyfulHeart (Moderator)

  • HealingSystemHealingSystem

    @Savi_Luna sadly that won't work. I live in Wisconsin. So far away

  • Mare_BearMare_Bear

    No need to be embarrassed about being touch starved, many of us here are touch starved. That’s why we are here, to connect with each other.

  • HealingSystemHealingSystem

    @Mare_Bear thank you so much! I'm glad there's a site for us😭🥲

  • IneedahugortwoIneedahugortwo

    Hi @HealingSystem, welcome to the site!
    First of all, let me congratulate you for coming here. It takes a lot to admit you’re touch starved, and even more to do something about it. Please don’t get discouraged if you don’t hear back from people. It’s very common, and most of the time, it has nothing to do with you! I would suggest reading the information on the links @CuddleDuncan provided you. He’s extremely knowledgeable about this site and has offered some of the best advice I have read in here, always super respectful and non bias towards anyone.
    There are some amazing people in here with a big heart Hope you find a nurturing and caring cuddle buddy soon! Be patient, and don’t lose hope.

    Sending virtual hugs 🫂 to you!

  • LadyVelLadyVel

    @HealingSystem Hi Mike! Welcome to the community, and it’s awesome that you’re navigating the website successfully. You're already doing great by asking these questions and being so considerate.

    First, don’t feel embarrassed—many people here can relate to feeling touch-starved, and it's great that you’ve taken this step. You’re definitely not alone in figuring things out.

    As @SunsetSnuggles mentioned, You can use the search function to look for cuddlers in your area and take a look at their profile. It’s perfectly okay to message people first since many people don't reach out first.

    When you reach out, you can introduce yourself, like you did here, and mention that you’re new, perhaps mention something about their profile. Get to know them a bit.

    As you may be aware already, this site has enthusiast members (non-paid) and professionals (paid) cuddlers. It can take a little longer to find an enthusiast to agree to cuddle. It can get discouraging at times but many times it has nothing to actually do with you.
    If you want to book a session with a professional cuddler, it's usually a little easier to get a response and book if there is someone in or near your area.

    If you’re worried about coming across in a certain way, just being upfront and respectful goes a long way. And I wouldn't stress about picking up on social cues too much—if you're ever unsure of something, you can always ask for clarification in a polite way.

    If we were closer I would come and give you a big hug. I hope you find the cuddles and comfort you need. 🫂

  • warm_embracewarm_embrace
    edited September 2024

    Welcome Mike! I checked out your area and there are 19 female professional (paid) cuddlers who are within 50 miles of you and were active in the past week.

    Check out their profiles and send a message to the cuddlers that you can afford and who you think you might click with. The messages can be brief, but you should introduce yourself, tell them when you are available, tell them how long you want to cuddle, and ask if they are interested and available. Once you’ve worked all that out, send a booking proposal and work out the logistics. It’s really that simple.

    If you prefer to try your luck with non-professional (unpaid) enthusiasts, there are 7 women and 10 men who cuddle with men and were recently active within 50 miles. This will likely require more interactions before setting up an actual cuddle and it is much more a hit or miss proposition.

    Good luck and happy cuddling!

  • hifigeorgehifigeorge

    @HealingSystem HI Mike, I'm George. I too am blind and have been on this site for a while. I've had some great cuddles along the way. It took some time though, so I'll go along with the other folks who have already given some great advice. At first, I was going to give you some tips for navigating this site, but it seems you're already doing okay there. I know some within the blind community would argue, but I think you're doing the right thing by just being honest. If you have any questions or concerns about navigating this site, I'm no expert, but I'll try to help in whatever way I can.

  • CuddleHugs01234CuddleHugs01234

    @HealingSystem I do know another blind person on here. If you want me to, I can send you his details. Maybe he could give some helpful tips.

  • 4cuddles4cuddles

    Hi Mike. Welcome to this site and nicd to read your message. Hope you have averall good experience, chatting and finding cuddle buddies.

  • warmlyhelenawarmlyhelena

    @HealingSystem Hi Mike! It looks like you have gotten some pretty good suggestions and advice here, but I wanted to chime in and say that I hope you find what you're looking for. I'm going to ask on the Pro forum to see if there are cuddlers in your area I can connect you with. I think you've gotten a really good start by filling out your profile, add as much as you can about yourself and your interests there! As a former enthusiast, I can say that a complete profile is a green flag for those who visit (at least it was to me). Good luck, and please keep us posted :)

Sign In or Register to comment.