@SnugglyJonny I have no idea why it's not showing or how to fix it. That's weird. But I see you do have pics. That's great. As you know men outnumber female enthusiasts, so it's just a matter of being patient.
I stopped at "a few weeks." Give it time, dude. A lot of time. And patience.
@whoismaryams
There has to be some type of investment with cuddling either time and connection (enthusiast) or money (pro).
@TheFunCartel 😂😂😂
@pmvines
There is no cracking the code here.
And so much other contribution of thought and ideas here.
Like others have said…. Educate yourself with the 100’s of pages of information because you are certainly not the only one struggling to connect. Even if you just scroll through the titles of the last 5 pages of forum threads you will find a plethora of information that will help you navigate this new process in your life. From both perspectives (professional or enthusiast) all compiled with years of experience from cuddly peeps who have been here more than a few weeks.
One other thing I always suggest is looking for groups in your area that do facilitated cuddle parties and help you with boundary discussion as well as internal growth. It’s a CHEAP way to possibly get your cuddle on with a few different folks at once.
Cheers to your first few experiences and as always…. “May the Cuddle Gods be Ever in your Favor!!” 😊
My two cents: Is that we match energy in this community on CC, I would say go from being in scarcity to switching on your joy mode and come out of dad mode. (Those are thing you can discuss during your session 💛) How about showing a bit of your personality(as an individual) vs what you’re lacking and or needing. Such as: What are you planning on bring to the session? What are some positive things you’re looking to accomplish or walk away with? Those of us that “feel” your words can tap into the desperation and urgency.(we all understand and have our moments too 🫶🏼) BUT That is not fun for us. Knowing the energy shift won’t be equal and we will be waking away drained. 😞😣😑
Lastly, try to think of your profile in the sense that If you were looking for a cuddle partner what would draw you in? What highlights would stick out to you? And pull from what makes you special or unique. Authenticity is everything around here
Ps I use the word “So” all the time!! For me it’s more of a so on and so forth…or my pause word lol far from self absorption BUT to each their own-perception … as for when I read it - “So” felt like you took a deep breath and then let loose what you needed to say, that was all …
It kinda seems like you’re emotionally dumping onto random strangers. I would avoid mentioning how your desire to date has been killed because it sounds like you’re on here looking for dates. Avoid the details about your kids for the same reason as above and also sounds like you’re using vulnerable to manipulate. It’s a lot of personal information that is not appropriate for strangers you’ve never met. Strangers you have no idea you can trust. You’re a guy so maybe it’s different, but I’d tell women to never be this vulnerable you’ll either scare a person off (emotionally dumping) or you’ll attract people looking to exploit you. Emotional/psychological safety is just as important as physical safety.
@SnugglyJonny select your profile icon in upper left, there’s a downward pointing triangle. Click that then select Edit Profile. Then select Edit Photos. You should see an outline of a star on your photos. Click the Star (it should turn yellow) on the photo you want to use as your profile photo/avatar. I’m using desktop and mobile browser and the steps should be the same for both.
I would probably avoid using the word "kill", as well. Try something a little more poetic like: "absolutely murder".
If you’re messaging enthusiasts, you’re not alone. Many people have this issue. If I was an enthusiast, I’d probably be looking for compatibility and genuine friendships and connections; people whom I had common interests with. If some random person messaged me and I didn’t see any astrology or things I was also interested in, I’d probably bypass. I’d need my interest piqued and it wouldn’t be off of looks. Women and men are quite different in this essence.
Anyway, probably too much information for a first message.
You already know the issue. Your opening message should be, "Hello CUDDLER, I like SOMETHING ABOUT THEIR PROFILE THAT INTERESTED YOU. I'm looking to cuddle in TIME FRAME. Would you be interested and available to set something up? I'd like to cuddle LOCATION ARRANGEMENTS. Thanks for considering, Jon."
You can decompress about your situation when you get to the cuddle session.
I have heard from some enthusiasts that they don't want an immediate request to cuddle. They want to get to know you first.
@DreamerDee that might work for a pro, but would not work for me as an enthusiast. OP was specifically looking for advice on attracting more responses from enthusiasts.
when someone reaches out to me with time frames and asking to set up a meetup, i pretty much don't reply.
You pay something for cuddles. It might be money. It might be time/effort/intention.
Understanding Boundaries & Etiquette
How to Create a Great Profile
How I found happiness on Cuddle Comfort (man seeking enthusiast women)
How I Found Happiness on CC Part 2: The First Meeting
It is easier to believe
I'm a non-pro woman on this site, and here's what I look for in a first message.
Thanks for all the advice! I did tweak my profile a bit and will keep doing so as necessary. I also have a better understanding of how to approach first messages. I was never disillusioned to think i would just sent a quick message and boom, be cuddling. What i was worried about is that if i search for all non-pro women in my state, there really aren't that many. I was worried about reaching out any more without getting some advice on how to do it properly as i would have run out of people to send messages to that i haven't already. And i assume as with any sites out there, multiple messages without replies are just desperation and will never get answered. So what happens when you run out of people to message? lol
Again, thanks all!!
"So" I'm brand new here and found your post. (how do you do, fellow dude.)
The thing that strikes me about your profile is that it really focused on your merits. As the primary parent in my kids' life, I applaud you, as I know how difficult it can be and that there's still a lot of stigma around dads who are invested and emotionally close to their kids.
My sense is that you want to convey the idea "I am a caring and dedicated father, which you can extrapolate out to me being a safe and sensitive cuddle companion". Someone coming here and reading your profile, however, might get the sense that you have lost your own identity, or worse, that you're here for relief from your kids, in which case you will be a net drain on any given cuddle-arrangement.
I imagine that folks here are looking for people who will contribute to a "cup-filling" experience for both parties. Being a wellspring of this kind of energy is really important in this kind of arrangement. You may possess that energy, but it doesn't come through in your profile.
Like I said, I'm literally brand new here, so take what I say w/ a grain of salt. g'luck, mate.
I don't think its what you are saying. I believe it's because there is very few enthusiast women on here. If you can't afford a professional you will probably have a hard time. The enthusiast probably cuddle with the same people multiple times so they cuddle with fewer people overall. Just think of it more like Massage Therapy or Reiki Energy Healing; it is usually provide by women for a fee. Cuddling has therapeutic benefits like they do.
Hey @SnugglyJonny welcome to CC..Lots of solid advice above.
This may seem obvious but just checking on how you are using your search settings. I just checked your area for women enthusiasts, and 49 women enthusiasts have been active on the site in a less than 100-mile radius in September alone.
In comparison my location same settings returned 24 women enthusiasts active. So, it looks like there are a good number of peeps in your area that display interest.
I would def google the cuddle party / gathering events info in your area and attend some of those. I went to one here in Columbus past weekend and met 5 women enthusiasts (none currently on CC) in one afternoon and got meaningful connections and at least long hugs from each. One is planning on coming over just to see my home (no cuddles planned) at end of October even.
congrats on beginning your cuddle journey here!
Cuddle parties are cool, but avoid the poorly named “Speed Cuddling” events. They attract meth heads.
@SnugglyJonny profile avatars sometimes don't show up due to photo formatting. I have found that taking a screenshot of the photo I want as my profile pic, crop it to size, and upload it works.
Too many words.
Too negative/depressing/needy.
And it’s all about yourself.
Try being upbeat, to the point, and mention something about them. There’s a reason you’re contacting them and not someone else - say it!
@SnugglyJonny I think the profile is looking a lot better. But don’t forget. It just still takes time to connect with enthusiasts. If you can keep meeting with pros occasionally and build up karma that helps a little. Karma isn’t everything and it certainly doesn’t mean someone is a good or safe cuddler. But it does at least show that you’re a real person and someone loved to tell the tal
@Sideon signs up for @TheFunCartel 's classes, because he's never painted shorts on classical nudes before. Who knew someone could teach this old dog new tricks?
To the OP, I commend your vulnerability and bravery and sticking with the feedback. There is no such thing as a CC expert. We have more flavors here than Baskin Robbins and that said, your message of yourself, no matter how well crafted, will never land for everyone, but with care and thought, your message WILL land. You be you.
Obnoxiously, I have this belief in social quantum physics. Spoiler Alert: You're going to attract those to you who match your energy.
Best wishes.
Too many references to dating, but most female enthusiasts don't even read their messages anymore, so don't feel bad (if you private message me, I'll send you examples of why not!) If you're ever in KC, let me know! I've been on this site for several years and almost no one leaves karma. I didn't even know about it until a few years ago so don't put too much stock in it!
It might also be helpful if your profile photo were a photo. It could be of something you're interested in or somewhere you want to go. Attach a picture showing your full face to every first message you send and make sure it's easy to tell which person in the photo is you! After all that, it would be out of your hands.
You sound like a great person! Perhaps getting a few more karmas will help (if and when you can afford a few more pros.) For me personally, the more karmas I see, the safer I feel meeting a new person. Good luck! 🤗