How do we stop Scammers?

bambam8686bambam8686
in General

Some Cuddlers require Deposits but only receive money through Zelle,venmo and cashapp where its impossible to your money back.

I recently just got scammed by a cuddler who had me pay $75 and never showed up but instead blocked my number and blocked me on the site..

Yet shes still on the site after being banned for 1hr. and Yes she has Karma and a bunch of photos

. (she only requires people with low karma to pay upfront im guessing they'll be less likely to get her banned. How do we go forward from here?

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Comments

  • Sheena123Sheena123

    I don’t think there’s much that can be done beyond reporting her. There are legit pros out there that require deposits to secure spots or to weed out time wasters but unfortunately, there are some out there who take the money and run. Shitty thing to do… 😓😓

    One reason why pros ask for deposits from low/ zero karma profiles is because the pro has nothing to go by in terms of talking with other pros from your karma to see how you are. Low to no karma are risky.

    Anywho, I’m sorry that happened 🥺

  • JustPlaneCuddleJustPlaneCuddle

    Hi, @bambam8686. Is it possible that this Cuddler felt uncomfortable with something you said or sent? What was the arrangement made? Did she express that she was on her way or give details or was it a complete cut off?

    I've had numerous male cuddle companions from this site and others that were new to cuddling. Some assumed I would back down from the rules if they pushed the line. I do not give refunds for those that have done something that violates my boundaries or violates the user terms. I automatically block them and report them.

    If you are concerned about this being a recurring problem, I'd recommend cuddling with an enthusiast or working with someone that has less stringent guidelines.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    You report her, and the moderators will work it out. If it happened as you describe, she owes you a re-schedule.

    You can also dispute the charge with your bank.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover

  • Jova114Jova114

    That sucks and I'm very sorry to hear that.
    I think some type of photo verification needs to be put in place in order to be a Pro.
    Nothing for the public to have but for the site and mods for this reason.

  • JustPlaneCuddleJustPlaneCuddle

    @Jova114 - I very much agree! Scammers happen on both ends; it's really disappointing and disheartening.

  • Jova114Jova114

    @JustPlaneCuddle it is!!
    Unfortunately that's a human being thing , as long as it's profitable someone will find a way to scam.
    With a photo verification system, it should limit it cause no scammer is going to want that info on a site database.

  • DaveFromSussexDaveFromSussex
    edited September 2023

    Thirded...some form of verification would be useful just in case.
    Hope everything works out for you though.

  • bambam8686bambam8686
    edited September 2023

    Its funny how im being blamed.
    I never said anything to her about the session. We only spoke about arranging a time to meet.

    I never asked any questions the only thing I asked the day before was is there anything I should know before meeting. and she just said shower before meeting.. I shower everyday but I yeah I made sure to take a shower right before meeting...

    The last time she answer the phone was for the deposit 50 min before the session started.

    Just for context Ill send proof.

    Im just more upset because a lack accountability. She was banned for an hour and unbanned. I dont belive this would be the case for a man.

    And yes It contains her fake number ( I was able to find her real number and that info so im not doxxing her)

  • Jova114Jova114

    @bambam8686
    Noo pictures!!

  • CuddleHugs01234CuddleHugs01234

    Maybe only pay through a service that you can get a refund. That could be one of your boundaries. And if they won’t do that, just schedule with someone else.

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @CuddleHugs01234 Yeah i usually do that if i dont trust the person! I didnt think it was smart for her to scam me becasue she seemed popular here... But i cant use logic to justify it. Paypal or nothing

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @Jova114 is it against the rules? if so Ill take them down now. I only posted it because somone was saying maybe it was me... and someone else was looking to book in miami and wanted to avoid her

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @JustPlaneCuddle Look at my new post you can see it had nothing to do with she just scammed me lol. She was comfortable until she got money 40 min before meeting and she said she arrived early then blocked me after she said she arrived

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @SunsetSnuggles She does owe me anything but money cause she blocked my number....

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @SunsetSnuggles I reported her they banned her and unbanned her. I guess my proof wasnt enough

  • Jova114Jova114

    @bambam8686 I believe pics of someone's information is against TOS.
    I don't remember the details, just air on the side of caution

  • WriterGFWriterGF
    edited September 2023

    The part I am most interested in is why she would have been banned and been able to get it reversed on appeal that quickly if things happen as you said. I wonder what case she made. And yes, you should take the screenshots down, that is against TOS.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @bambam8686 This is a matter between you and the mods, not for the public. @Jova114 is correct, it is against the rules to post personal information (you've posted her number, payment info, and photo).

    I'm sorry these things happen. Dispute the charge with your bank, they'll give it back.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    I removed them thanks for letting me know @Jova114 . @SunsetSnuggles her photo is on the site im sorry if that offended you we need to protect her ID at all costs. Youre right its not for public disusiion unless its the man scamming her or making her feel uncomfortable

  • bambam8686bambam8686

    @WriterGF Thats what made me make this discoussion cause it upset me ! and I was finally responded to by a mod and she sent them a fake cashapp of her sending a refund to me LOL. but it was to another cashapp account she probably made so Im confident itll be resolved now but its crazy even someone who had demand (with karma ) would do that

  • WriterGFWriterGF

    @bambam8686 I understand you're upset, but things like "we need to protect her ID at all costs" will wind up just getting you suspended. Site rules are site rules. Railing against them gets you nowhere here. Faking a refund will get her banned, no need to follow her out.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @bambam8686 It didn't offend me. It's against the rules to show a picture that identifies a person you are posting about, without their permission.

    I'm merely telling you the rules so that you don't get yourself in trouble.

    Women have outed men in similar ways, here, and that gets shut down exactly the same. Gender makes no difference to me.

    I'm glad you heard back from a mod and it's being sorted out. 😊

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover

  • LovelightLovelight

    @bambam8686 Wow, that sounds really awful, sorry you had to go through it, and I hope you get a resolution. I don't really know how booking with pros work, though I personally video call with enthusiasts when we seem interested to meet or around the day we wanna meet. I find that more helpful than relying on just photos. Another tip may be to look up the number and see if it seems legit, this might be entering it in your WhatsApp. If no associated WhatsApp shows up and it says "this person isn't on WhatsApp, invite" then I'd take that as a red flag. Even if it shows and messages go through if you decide to talk there in the case of enthusiasts, I can't comment about pros, it doesn't necessarily mean it's legit. Though the latter is a red flag to me. As far as I can see I think you did the best you could to be careful and given that I don't know much about how pros work, I can't offer much help there.

  • LovelightLovelight

    @bambam8686 "Youre right its not for public disusiion unless its the man scamming her or making her feel uncomfortable"

    I don't think at all that that's what @SunsetSnuggles is saying. You can and should be able to seek support with what happened to you. Though what she and others are saying that as far as posting her personally identifiable stuff, it's against the rules, and should only be something to talk with the moderators about. I understand this experience has you really upset. Though I hope it doesn't get in the way of you being able to not take things being said to you the wrong way because of it.

  • SunsetSnugglesSunsetSnuggles

    @Lovelight Just clarifying, are you saying you take it as a red flag if someone isn't on WhatsApp? I've never had an account there because it was my impression that that app was mostly used for sexual purposes (isn't it the one with disappearing messages?). So neither my real phone number, nor my Google Voice number, would show on there.

    ~ Sunset Snuggles

    🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover

  • Jova114Jova114

    @SunsetSnuggles
    I have whatsapp for my friends and family Sometimes me texts don't go through.

  • demi_fdemi_f

    Literally the exact same thing happened to me two days ago and it was for 700$, but that was my bad. She told me some of it as a loan. I only paid her after verifying her information and meeting irl but she said she wasn't able to cuddle at the time and needed to reschedule. When I came back to the same place apparently she didn't even live there. Like she met me outside the door of a place she never lived in. I sent proof of my texts to her and the 700$ in cashapp, and the part where the next day she blocked me but nothing happened.

  • LovelightLovelight

    @SunsetSnuggles You might be mistaking it with Snapchat, that's the one I used to hear was heavily used for it and yes I'd consider it a red flag if a man asks for it or sends me one. I never heard of WhatsApp being heavily used for that. Though just about anything can be used for that and I think all major chatting platforms for a minute now in one way or another have disappearing messages.

    Yes, I take it as a red flag, especially since I've had at least one or two men in the past send me "their" number. Then when I'd check, it'd not show on there. So when I'd ask about it, they'd end up sending another number.

    Sometimes they'd say they're new to the country and are using x foreign number still (which is what they send to me), though end up sending me their local number after. Or maybe say one or the other is their work number. So ever since, I take note of that and think of it as a red flag, not necessarily an end of discussion. Though a red flag nonetheless and I've other ways to vet too. Plus given that I'm going for enthusiasts, I really have the liberty to take my time and make sure I implement whatever safe guards I have in place.

    So if inconjection with a shady number things aren't looking good, then I do what I gotta do thereafter to protect myself.

  • SoosonSooson

    **Maybe this belongs in the Utopia room but whatever **
    A smart contract is a self-executing contract with the terms of the agreement directly written into code and executed on a blockchain or distributed ledger technology platform. It can be used to automate and enforce various types of agreements, including those related to meeting at an agreed-upon time and location in return for compensation.

    To prevent fraud in such a scenario using a smart contract, you would design the contract with specific conditions and mechanisms to ensure that both parties fulfill their obligations. Here's how it could work:

    Smart Contract Terms: The smart contract would include the terms of the agreement, such as the agreed-upon time, location, and compensation amount.

    Time and Location Verification: The contract could incorporate external data sources or oracles to verify the agreed-upon time and location. For example, it could access GPS data or a trusted time source to confirm that the meeting took place at the correct time and place.

    Escrow Mechanism: The compensation would be placed into an escrow account within the smart contract before the meeting. The funds would be locked until the conditions are met, which ensures that the compensation is available, but not yet accessible to either party.

    Proof of Meeting: Both parties may need to provide proof of the meeting, such as a digital signature or other verification method. This proof would be recorded on the blockchain as part of the contract execution.

    Automated Payment: Once the contract verifies that the meeting occurred at the agreed-upon time and location, it would automatically release the compensation from the escrow to the party entitled to it.

    Dispute Resolution: In case of a dispute, the smart contract could include a mechanism for arbitration. A third party or an oracle could be designated to resolve disputes based on the evidence provided.

  • Jova114Jova114

    @Lovelight
    I can understand where you are coming from,
    In my acting out time I would use one of those fake number apps to talk to people I shouldn't.
    So my feeling is if you're using a fake number, you are probably up to no good.

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