@achetocuddle posted: "It seems kinda disingenuous ... to act like the average married woman ... would be ok or indifferent to their husband cuddling someone."
Mmhmmmm. If they think their wives would be okay with it, why don't they tell them? Why do they hide their face? Only cuddle during work trips? Give us fake names?? Because they know their wives would either be devastated, or furious.
If it weren't a betrayal, they would have nothing to hide. Those for whom it is not a betrayal have consent from their significant others.
~ Sunset Snuggles
🦄 Enthusiast 🏞 Travel Fiend 🐘 Animal Lover
@SunsetSnuggles @achetocuddle If I had a wife and she cuddled behind my back, I'd definitely feel betrayed.
True words from the 🐐 (s).
CuddleChurch.
Where shame is part of the game.
(CuddleChurch patent pending...)
@unsocial_bee So somehow, the wife found out the husband was cuddling and then made an CC account and then found your name (and others) linked to his? I guess the husband told the wife about CC and his activity here? I’ve seen others mentioned this here before. I just have to wonder… Way too much craziness for me. Does anyone remember Peyton Place? No, I am pretty sure you haven’t but that’s what it reminds me of.
I would never cuddle with a married woman. It would not feel right.
@carrieanne maybe the wife accidentally saw an email notification, found his profile here, made herself an account and then followed the karma to contact those he'd cuddled.
@carrieanne I assumed he didn’t tell her but she went through his phone/computer and discovered who he was messaging.
@Minestrone101 posted: "@SunsetSnuggles @achetocuddle If I had a wife and she cuddled behind my back, I'd definitely feel betrayed."
Really lovely to hear this coming from a man. I've honestly never heard a guy address this, before. Thank you! 🫂
@BJC posted: "I would never cuddle with a married woman. It would not feel right."
Nice to hear this, as well! I will say, with the relationship Status on Pro pages being hidden, the only way you can know in that case is to ask and hope for a truthful answer. From what I've gathered, many Pro's here are married or in a relationship, and do not advertise this - every Pro I have met in person has been married or attached.
I do have a question for you, though. How do you feel about those whose significant other is aware of, and supportive of, their spouse/partners's involvement in the cuddle world? Most people who are attached, are here behind their spouse's/girlfriend's back...but some of us, like myself, are open with their partner, and their cuddle friends, about being in a relationship. My boyfriend knows that cuddling makes me happy, and he not only approves of me being here, but he's met a number of my cuddle friends. I don't view cuddle friends as simply a warm body strictly to cuddle...they are my actual friends, and as such, I tell my boyfriend about them, and tell them about my boyfriend.
Would you feel any differently in a scenario like this, given that my boyfriend is aware and consenting? Or would you still draw the line and pass on cuddling someone like me, due to it still not feeling right? I'm just very curious, no hurt feelings either way. 😊
@SunsetSnuggles I'm surprised no one has voiced that. Men get jealous or upset over their partners DMing someone of the opposite sex or overly liking someone's IG pics and of course being on dating apps. I see cuddling as being similar : spending extended periods of time hugging and squeezing someone that's not your partner. Even if it's platonic, it's the hiding that's the problem, or betrayal as I may say.
@Minestrone101 I imagine they don't bring it up here, because it would paint them in a hypocritical light.
@SunsetSnuggles Well, that's a passage from the great Greek philosopher Hypocrites.
Imagine if you’re married and you give someone a hug. I feels hugs are overstepping the boundary. I think more people should ask if someone is married before giving them a hug and getting their partner’s approval. (s)
I kind of skipped over this thread because I don’t know what there is to explore here, sometimes people lie about who they are and stuff
But totally @SunsetSnuggles @achetocuddle if I had a wife and she cuddled behind my back I would definitely feel betrayed
Just going to edit my comment and follow the thread.
@magpie17201
If you were trying to signal sarcasm, I think you punctuated that improperly.
See below.
Imagine if you’re married and you smile at someone. I feel smiles are overstepping the boundary. I think more people should ask if someone is married and get their partner’s approval before smiling at them.
/s.
Well I for one have to admire Cyn86. Not only did she figure out a way to block married men, she figured out a way to block everyone!!
👍
@CuddlinginSalem HA! 😁
Watch out everyone, @Katota is back
@Sooson Lol! 😄 As if I'd ever leave voluntarily, I adore hanging out here on CC with ya'll. Including you as well, Sooson.😁
By the way, I'm Kermit and you're Animal. No arguing, just accept it.😁🫂
This is for Sunset Snuggles (I don't know how to do the "at" thing; someone tell me), I would decline to cuddle if the woman was in a relationship with someone else, even if not actually married. I would consider it risky, in terms of emotional attachments and entanglements. Were I married, I would be dismayed if my wife cuddled other men.
Sunset, I didn't fully answer your question. I would still decline even if the woman's partner knew and approved.
Read my profile
If I were asked to cuddle with a married person, I think I would want to hear directly from the spouse that it was okay first.
@WriterGF THIS!👍
but what if the spouse takes exception? What if they're really not okay with this?
Definitely what if THIS!👍👍
You can wind up in the middle of something you really don't want to be.
Oh no, as I don't want THIS^ to happen! 👍👍👍
The last thing most people need in their life is an angry phone call from someone's spouse.
👍👍👍👍
Very last thing I want to happen is THIS^,🤨 because angry phone calls/text messages, pissed off spousal visits to one's home (or even jobs) perhaps a little property damage/physical assaults occurring...Does happen indeed!😬😒 I have watched that kind of SH...Uhh...POOP (Thank you@Pmvines for the censor replacement 😄💩) happening to others when it comes to engaging with married folks and their lies.😑 You just never know what may happen, when you cuddle someone who is married while ALSO BEING DISHONEST to their spouse.😌 So unless I can talk or meet him/her/them/whatever in person to discuss "how PLATONIC cuddling with Katota🫂" will go down AND to get verification from his/her/their/whatever end and receive an " it IS OK👌 to cuddle" with said spouse. 😊
There just won't be any cuddling when it comes to married/attached people with me. Nope!🤷♀️😊
Now I understand that there are certain exceptions regarding one's spouse/partner who may be mentally or physically limited or just physically/mentally incapable of cuddling (or engaging in type of physical affection) anymore. I do understand those marital situations' difficulties can indeed be a sad and heartbreaking fact.💔😔
HOWEVER....☝️😌
I still need to at least SEE 👀 him/her/them/whatever to visually witness that mental or physical disability for MYSELF AND FOR MY OWN PEACE OF MIND anyway before cuddling can begin.😏😌
If they think their wives would be okay with it, why don't they tell them? Why do they hide their face? Only cuddle during work trips? Give us fake names??
👍👍👍
@SunsetSnuggles Uh huh!😒 Lol! They DO love those "work trip cuddles", don't they? 🙄😏😜
im curious how many people commenting in this thread that are very opinionated about this topic, are actually married.
Imagine if you’re married
@MonkeyNeedsAHug 🚫🚫🚫Oh no!😵😵💫😵 There will NOT be ANY "imagining of marriage" for me anymore!🤚😑 As the reality of marriage (for Me) did not sit well when I WAS married the first (and last) time...Nah, I'll imagine running through the woods with werewolves instead.🐺😁
I know your comment was "sarcasm", but my response isn't.😊
@Seeker864 I did.😊
From your profile:
That applies here because I am leaving this site.
Okay, farewell. 👋
Katota, how you missed the point. Farewell, make a lot of money on this.
…
@Seeker864 I read your profile.
Personally, I'm an enthusiast who chooses to cuddle everyone for free. (So is @Katota...so that "stop and be curious" part of your profile would apply to yourself, as well.) Pro's have a Professional tag and pricing on their profiles; enthusiasts do not. Not everyone is here to make money.
Your profile said: "If a few of you cuddles stopped to talk first you might have found who I am and gladly taken my money and spent an hour, but you chose to be judgmental instead of curious."
I'm always willing to talk with any married or attached man on this site about his specific situation. I'm approached by them all the time.
I have deep sympathy and compassion for men who are in unhappy, unhealthy, or unfulfilled marriages. My heart breaks for them. I have some close friends who I care deeply about, in these kinds of scenarios. I just also have empathy for their wives, and would never want to put them in a place that would horrify me to be in, and break trust.
That said, my general practice is to talk it through, just as you asked. I've had men share deep pain with me to the point I decided they needed and deserved cuddles more than I needed to protect their abusive wives from "hurt" or jealousy.
I think what's often missed, is that there are THREE kinds of married men, here.
1 - Those here to flippantly run around behind their wives' back. 2 - Those here out of desperation, suffering through really heartbreaking relationships. 3 - Those here with their wives' knowledge and consent.
There are, by far, more of Type 1. How do I know? As you so highly regard - I am curious, I care, I ask questions because I want to get to know people. Nearly every single man I've conversed with on this site, who is married, has answered me that his wife does not know he is here, and also that he has no intention of changing anything about his relationship.
I will always advocate for either marriage counseling, or divorce, if someone is in an unhappy or unhealthy relationship. Every single time, every man I've prompted regarding marriage counseling, has some half-baked reason why it wouldn't work (despite never having tried), and that it's "not worth it". If this kind of Type 1 man doesn't think trying to improve his situation is worth it, that trying to have a better, healthier, and more communicative relationship with his wife is worth it, then I'm sorry, but he's not worth my time. I will not involve myself in stagnant relationships with obstinate people who want to complain but never put any work in for improvement or escape.
Type 1 men often leave their relationship Status blank, they respond with immaturity when asked what the situation is, and they most often get combative.
For Type 2, those who are in a really unfortunate situation, who want change, who are going to counseling, actively seeking a divorce, or are living through something that is inescapable like dementia or a disability...those men of action, those men of integrity, those are the types of married men who I will absolutely consider cuddling.
As I mentioned in a recent thread...it's all about context, it's all about tone, it's all about patterns.
Type 2 men tend to put that they're married on their profile, they will bring it up, they will offer the background, and they converse on the subject with calmness...and genuine sadness.
For the record, Type 3 men here are extremely, extremely rare. My PM inbox currently has 93 pages of messages, and the vast majority of them are men... I can honestly tell you that I have met less than five men who were here with their wives' consent, out of those 900+ people.
@Seeker864 I hope that if you leave this site, it's not because you feel judged by generalizations on the message board.
If you are a Type 1, I hope you leave because you respect your wife and don't want to do things that would be hurtful to her and detrimental to your marriage.
If you are Type 2, I hope you stay, I hope you're interested in either improving or else leaving your marriage, and I hope that you find compassionate cuddles, in the interim.
And if by some miracle, you are Type 3 - cheers, mate! I've been with my boyfriend for nearly six years - he knows of, approves of, and supports me being part of this beautiful cuddle world.
TL;DR: As @cuddlefaery posted: "Most people don't mind so much that cuddle partners are married, they mind that their partners are lying to their significant others"
@Seeker864 @Katota Isn't a pro? Seems you aren't bothering to read others profiles