Aw, @beachbuns you just got the black star for ignorance. As a gay man, I fully accept the fact that most of the men on this site, most of the men in the U.S., would not consider cuddling with me. I get that, it’s not a problem for me. But you have asserted that a straight-identifying man who would consider cuddling another man must be gay or bi. That logic, carried to its extreme, says any woman who would cuddle with you should expect it to be a sexual event. The scariest part is that I’m guessing the latter is true.
Thank you @mickcuddles.
My opinion also, couldn't have said it better as a straight identifying woman.
I believe we have a new troll among us. But I'm fresh out of troll food.
@mickcuddle @PaulaDahla Thank you! Great points! ?? My opinion and lifestyle too. Straight man cuddling everyone!?
Can we please focus only on the original topic of the post and not presume to give opinions that no one wants to know on subjects no one wanted to talk about? Lest I delete this post.
On a more positive note... I’m really glad that this post has drawn out so many reasonable and positive and polite people and such varying views, opinions, and experiences. I think we can all agree to resolve to enter the new year (if you believe in that) with open minds and reasonable and kind expectations and views of others. No one is above doing at least that.
Women hold hands, link arms, dance together, kiss cheeks.
Some see affection between men as purely gay.
I’d happily do all the “women” things with a guy is we cared about each other. Affection is lovely and it shows you care.
It’s kind of interesting, I just realized I would feel way more comfortable doing physical affection type things with another man if he was not American. It’s like, it doesn’t bother me if it’s accepted culturally somewhere else.
I’m bi and I cuddle any gender but I’ll admit it’s still awkward to touch straight men. Recently during the holidays I held hands with other men (family members) during grace before meals. The man hand feels like a large, callous reminder of the taboo. “Men don’t touch men.” I try not to think about it but there it is, the truth. Holding a woman’s or gay man’s hand is easier. It seems to happen naturally. I can’t explain the difference other than social stigma. But maybe there’s more to it. I love this quote from a previous thread about man-man cuddling, "men are hairy and kinda gross" Funny because it’s true. And some people like hairy, gross men. This platonic cuddling phenomenon has pushed me to cuddle people (men and women) who I am not attracted to. This has required that I step outside of some boundaries. I’m not sure where it will lead but I like the idea of removing sexual implications from platonic contact as much as possible. It’s just unfair that I somehow learned touch is only for sex. Doing my best to imagine what platonic touch really is.
BRAVO @tallmann!
Anyway, if you love someone then you have to remember 2 things.
1, should not matter if you are both same or opposite sex.
2, not all love is sexual.
I’d love to hear the words “I love you” occasionally
I can’t help but think of Friends when Joey and Ross has the best nap ever lol. I think men prefer women as it falls into a maternal thing. Everyone has mommy and daddy issues. There’s healthy and unhealthy. Cuddling is a healthy thing. Both my parents would scratch my head and back. Therefore, I believe I’d be fine cuddling either sex. With another man it just might take a minute to get those certain notions out of the brain and just enjoy the moment
I am just going to be straight up honest, and put my opinion out there, but I won't cuddle with guys. It has more to do with that I don't like guys in general. No clue why, I just don't. It isn't that I hate guys though, I just feel rather indifferent towards them. Of course, there are those I find cool, or respect, but to me it is more of a role model thing, something to aspire to be, rather than to be around.
@labelz I’d forgotten that Joey & Ross on the couch moment. It was pretty affirming, in that both were shocked and maybe embarrassed when they both woke up and saw what had happened, but it wasn’t life-altering or earth-shaking for either of them.
Care and affection is nice. Why should it matter what sex the cuddles are?
I don't like that it's ether you cuddle with guys or you are homophobic. I hang with gay people often but still would only cuddle with a women. I prefer the company of feminine energy. Nothing wrong with that. It's not about sex, it's just a preference
I’m very open in this department. In fact it would be cool to cuddle with two guys together or even a straight couple. I get your point on the male on male cuddlethough for a straight male. You have to go with what is most comfortable for you in the end.
@braintree5 & @nickoli you are so right, preferences don't make a person homophobic or homosexual. It's all about energy, fit, and comfort. Cathy - I as well have no problem cuddling the same sex and threesomes are nice which is probably why so many cuddle parties or cuddle piles go on and are well attended. But I do have a personal preference a body type I want to cuddle more than others and when I cuddle a woman it's totally different then with a man. Unless she actually asks for more intimacy, we'll have a more social, active, cuddle because we're two women and we relate differently.
When I cuddle women we are more active, like girlfriends on a sleep over type cuddle rather than the still, full body contact I crave from men. I prefer men, but I'll cuddle a woman; just differently. It's still an amazing cuddle, it just satisfies different needs, it's like a family or affirming cuddle - more emotional than physical.
So I've tried to bring this around once before, maybe I'll try again. I know there are men here who are comfortable cuddling other men. Who are assured enough in themselves to understand that a cuddle is amazing; that there's many different types of cuddles & a good bro session is better than no touch at all? Any guy here that'd be comfortable with backs thumped, elbows nudged, arms on the back of chairs, knees knocking during man spreads? Thumb wrestling, complex hand greetings, go cart racing, target shooting, or wing eating contests? Working out at a gym, spotting each other or pushing each other to do more then sucking it in when a sweet thing walks by. Guys! Cuddling doesn't have to be laying down somewhere or even sitting somewhere with full body contact if that's uncomfortable. It can be playing video games or checkers together, swimming or surfing together while checking out the ladies in bikini's. It's bro time, a time for you to connect as only two male friends can. That vibe from time well spent being active with another dude. If something develops from there such as hugs or scalp massages all the better.
There's been a few guys earlier in this thread that have spoken in favor of it and honestly I'm both impressed & all the more UNhappy they don't live close enough for me to cuddle because a man who's confident and assured enough to admit the need for all types of cuddles is very attractive to women. He's one man I'd be first in line to cuddle. If one of us ever moved!
See the wonder!
@PaulaDahla Very true, men having bonding activities whether checking out women together, watching/playing sports and other fun activities. Sometimes during these activities physical contact happens through handshakes, hugs, fist/chest bumps and or even slaps on the butt. Also more men than will admit to it have cuddled and or slept in the same bed before with a close male friend (but deny due to fear of societies expectations and feeling bad for not living up to it). Both activities could happen innocently with family too. Men crave and do show affection as well but sadly societies double standards (as previously mentioned), are a major barrier. I also agree with your view that cuddling does not have to be body to body. There are many positions for cuddling and or other ways of showing platonic affection. Many people of both genders show affection to others all of time whether platonic or in relationship and it’s all beautiful. Sadly in many societies many people are lacking close human contact, touch and connection. We all crave it and that’s why we joined this site. I must give credit also to some of the past posts that I read from men that only cuddle women, in this forum. Some of these men openly admitted that they would hold hands, hug and or even kiss a man, depending on thier culture but not cuddle. Most of these men had profile picture, so I admire thier bravery and honesty. Also I appreciate you for saying that men that cuddle other men and or both genders are very desirable for cuddling. Much love ❤️ for your acceptance of us and we want to cuddle you too! To sum it up whether traditional cuddling or not there are many ways that men can bond with each other. Platonic bonding in general can lead to all of us feeling great!?
I'm guessing this thread's original intention was to see if men were open to full "cowlick to toenail" cuddling with other men. But this site is about touch, connection, affirmation, and personal acknowledgement; I think that both sexes would be open to different forms of that. Even these forums and the back and forth discussions that take place are a form of acknowledgement. We get a sense of validation when someone's affected by our comment enough to respond. That's a cuddle ya know!! It is. In fact it's one of the best ones, cuz it's not based on what the commentator looks like at all, it's aimed completely at the inner being not the skin suit that personality inhabits. One last bit on this, actually two! First, a few years ago when I was in active weight loss I spent vast amounts of time in a nutrition shop. It was conveniently located directly across the street from one of those meathead gyms where it's all about the pump me up and build bulk. The owner of this shop was a professional body builder and even had the requisite competition pictures of himself on the wall all oiled, cut and assuming the pose. But he is a teacher at heart, so I was in there often getting advice; again I'm 5'3" and at the time I was around 300 pounds so when all these muscle bound, over 6 foot men, tanned and cut in the middle of winter, all jumped up on T came in to discuss things with the owner I was definitely the one who didn't belong!
Here's my point, these Atlas-sized men stood next to each other, arms crossed over massive chests & just talked. Often about their messed up personal relationships, or who can spot for who, or their unwillingness to stop the current cycle of testosterone. They were bonding, they were getting affirmation & acknowledgement. I don't go to that gym by choice and the one I do work out at I notice no one is around to spot by the free weights, no one is working out together, pushing each other to do better or get through it. Guys - that's a form of cuddling for men!! It is, in only a way that men can accomplish. Those men at the store weren't full contact cuddling but they stood as close together as possible often a hairsbreadth between them easing their sense of isolation in being an extreme body builder in a world that doesn't. Getting confirmation and affirmation - respect - from each other. Brotherhood is a Cuddle!
Second point someone just pointed out to me in a private message, two men that are confident enough to hold hands in public; sit next to each other, an arm draped over the others chair without worrying about what society thinks of them. Men, that confidence, the awareness of self it takes to do that in public without shame or fear. It's massively sexy to the opposite sex. We as women are totally attracted to men with that kind of self esteem, self respect. If you want women to cuddle let them see you like that and you'll have to beat them away with a badminton bat! Or the cord of your controller if you haven't taken the plunge to wireless controllers yet! haha Nothing more potent and sexually powerful than a man who has confidence to do what's right or good without giving a rip about who thinks otherwise! Just sayin'!
thanks for the acknowledgement cuddle TMGrad!
What about man-pillow cuddling?
I cuddle pillows.
Come at me bro.
@chococuddles Return of the SoftestPillow!
A little young but no age discrimination here!
Bring the soft!
Well, nothing more caring than the real touch.
I’d happily sit, watching a film, with a Male, cuddled. It shows you care.
@braintree5 I totally agree and would do the same!??
Brokeback mountain was a great movie though
I'll cuddle with a pre-op trans man, thats a man-man cuddle right lol
@chococuddles I cuddle a couple of pillows as I sleep every night. If it were war and would squirm around a bit,it woul replace a live body of any sex or gender expression. Maybe.
A pillow is not the same. If any guy sat next to me and tested his head on my shoulder I’d happily wrap an arm around him.
It shows you care.
A straight guy would NEVER cuddle with another guy. End of story.