Cuddling + Age Issues

[Deleted User]SuperSnuggler2 (deleted user)
edited February 2021 in General

I wanted to open up a discussion around age and cuddling, giving some examples I've encountered on CC both as a pro and an enthusiast:

  1. Men who are older (45+) who choose to cuddle only younger women. As in I've been told they do not cuddle with women "my age."
  2. I've also had men complain to me about bad cuddles with younger women.
  3. I've also had younger men (like 20-somethings) that have told me they like to cuddle older women only.
  4. People who post very old photos which, I assume, is to appear more youthful? For example, one person had black hair in their profile photo but was all white IRL.

I understand people like what they like, and I am certainly not here to bash or stereotype ANYONE. I am just repeating my personal experiences and musing on how age plays into platonic cuddling. I would be interested to hear other people's experiences and opinions.

FYI: I don't lie about my age nor do I have issues with my age. I am 51. I feel I take care of myself and, in general, have a youthful nature. My photos are recent (within the past 6 months).

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Comments

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited February 2021

    Indeed. This is a complicated and potentially touchy subject.

    I've cuddled both with women my age and with younger women. Women around my age seem less likely to provide outright terrible experiences - the no-shows, ghosts, and thieves seem to all be in their 20s. Sometimes the younger cuddlers have an energy that the older ones don't. But overall they're not that different.

    I'll continue to cuddle both age groups. However, I do understand why some men prefer to cuddle younger women (even though it can seem a little skeevy and they don't always express their preference in the most polite way possible). IMO it comes down to this: if I'm paying for someone's company, I'd like it to be somebody I couldn't easily meet for free. I can date 40 year old women pretty easily. Dating 25 year old women, while possible, is much harder because they are completely suffocating in male attention. Plus dating a 25 year old may not even be a great idea to begin with. So it seems pretty natural that when I'm looking through a list of cuddlers, my inclination isn't to choose the ones who seem like 90% of my matches on dating apps.

    So... yeah. Kind of a touchy subject, but those are my thoughts.

    People who post very old photos which, I assume, is to appear more youthful?

    Yes I think both women and men do this. I've met a few women who barely look like their profile photo. Of course I don't approve of this behavior... but I try not to be too judgmental. People are under a lot of pressure to look attractive. I feel like I don't look any worse than I did 10 years ago. But maybe in another 10 years I'll feel this same pressure... Hopefully I will deal with it gracefully.

  • [Deleted User]arghdaddy (deleted user)

    No issue whatsoever as to age. I do prefer women who are more “snuggly”, for lack of a better word. It’s just warmer, more cuddly, comfortable. After finding out about this wondrous thing called cuddling, we all deserve to have it.

  • [Deleted User]Spock (deleted user)
    edited February 2021

    The situation is complicated by the fact that this site has both enthusiasts and Pros on it.

    I think most men would be happy to cuddle with women of any age, provided the women are an enthusiasts too. When people pay for a Pro, they will expect something better (younger, cuddlier, prettier, more attention) than what they can get from an enthusiast. A woman who has some special training (touch healer, degree in mental health, reiki, etc.) can reasonably expect men to pay to cuddle with her, even is she is not young or traditionally 'attractive'. She is providing a valuable service and men will pay for it.

    For perspective, my cuddling experience is limited to just one Pro who gave me so much attention and comfort that it truly lifted my spirits. @keeleyshoup behaved like a friend who cared about me, and was genuinely affectionate during our sessions. I was happy to pay for her service multiple times because it was beyond anything I could expect from an enthusiast.

    People are willing to lower their expectations when something is free, or a shared passion. When asked to pay for an experience, people's expectations goes up. If the woman has nothing to offer besides being a woman, it would be very hard to convince anybody to pay to cuddle with her, unless they find her 'attractive / soothing' in some way. After all, the men are willing offer their masculine company for free. I expect (straight?) women get as much value out of cuddling as men do.

    I'll close by saying that this is just my response to your questions. I make no judgements on what people want, or are willing to provide, in return for money.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
    edited February 2021

    @SuperSnuggler2 the thing is that people on the forums tend to say & present themselves in a politically correct manner almost always... which anyone of us could do, ... but their actions away from here say otherwise (as you have pointed out above) & I’m sure there are plenty of pros here who read some of the threads / comments & just gasp at these answers because they have first hand experience with some of the members ...

    With that said, I see age differently ... when it comes to cuddling I value other specific things but I would prefer if the cuddler is younger than my mom, and not in her teens (mid 20’s & up) ... in my dating life I would prefer if she’s no more or no less than 4 years my age regardless which direction ... Ofcourse there are exceptions to the rules (or any rules at that) but this is my take on this 🌌

  • [Deleted User]DrCuddleBug (deleted user)

    @Spock men paying expect something better, which means younger (among other things listed)? I have cuddled with women of all ages, though most have been closer to my age (which is real, and my picture is current). I have only cuddled with a pro once. My preference in cuddling is to cuddle someone closer to my age. I have a litany of reasons, but they are just that ... preferences. It seems to me that by sheet percentages, if I am seeking a pro on this site, she is likely to be 20 years my junior (at least).

  • pmvinespmvines

    Sad to hear people equate younger as being better . And that paying to cuddle means age determines the value. I have cuddled people 20 plus years in both directions so all ages to me are of value and had special qualities to them.

  • TheFunCartelTheFunCartel
    edited February 2021

    I have been 29 years old for almost 30 years now and there is good and bad in all ages.

  • littermatelittermate

    Yup, quite a touchy area. Ventured into it myself a while back on a different thread, I think from another direction but don't remember. What I love about this site is that I HAVE connected with men much younger than me (being one of the only enthusiasts in a 200 mile radius aids that I'll bet) and may eventually cuddle with someone older. I like the humanness of it. I like taking it out of the mating and dating game and discovering the wide feast of humanity for which cuddling has the potential. I think someone who cuddled me now, at 59, versus what I was like at 24, would find a much better cuddle, even if I was stereotypically more "desirable" at 24. I think the site has the potential for us to act out our stereotypical preferences, but it also has the potential for us to stray well outside them and discover something new. And I find there's so much to feel along the way, which I love -- sorting out the conditioned aspects of attractions and aversions to discover the joys outside of those limiting tracks.

    I think youth and age both have things to offer, and that it's much more the human inside the package that makes a cuddle partner "good."

    And @pmvines just to express how much I appreciate you in an ongoing way, here's a little musical tidbit for ya. Talk about the gifts of youth! Go girls!

    https://youtu.be/Uds7g3M-4lQ

  • [Deleted User]CuddleMeLater (deleted user)
    edited February 2021

    Sad to hear people equate younger as being better .

    Yeah that's how one person phrased it and that's kind of what I meant when I said some people are skeevy or impolite when talking about this. "Better" isn't really how I see it. Still, as I said, I don't think it's crazy if, when someone's going to pay for company, they look for people outside the group they normally socialize with for free.

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream
    edited February 2021

    @pmvines I tried to keep my mouth shut about this but I’m glad you pointed it out (at younger being better) ... it has been mentioned more than once already , & this is not to single anyone out, infact I’m glad about people being honest about their feeling & how they view it... its just the hypocrisy that is laughable... I won’t comment on one of my old threads inorder to not bump it myself, but if someone finds it and does, you, (meaning anyone reading) will see how almost virtually every single one mentions that they have zero views / no objections to who the person is or age - attraction level ect & that they only seek the therapeutic qualities (what a nice answer) I mean the list really goes on ... now here all of a sudden younger is better lol smh ... make up your mind guys

    If anything I would think I would soo much get a better therapeutic session from someone “older” vs “younger” but I’m wise enough to know that it is based on a person by person basis (not a generalization) ... however , this thread is very revealing & turned out to be very important - thank you for making this thread @ OP .

  • GallowglassGallowglass

    Old guy. Younger cuddlers only. They don't "feel" tired. It's a very different energy. Admitting, there are outliers.

  • [Deleted User]SuperSnuggler2 (deleted user)
    edited February 2021

    @Gallowglass really?? Bec I’ve had several men tell me their younger pro cuddling partner fell asleep on them so they basically paid them to take a nap. lol

    Btw, I’ve never fallen asleep in a cuddle, as an enthusiast or pro, that wasn’t an overnight. 😉😁

  • UKGuyUKGuy

    My personal experience, being an older guy, is that the few older women that appear in my area mostly want to cuddle with younger guys. So the age discrimination that the original poster mentions works both ways.

  • quietman775quietman775

    My youngest-ever cuddle partner was 21. My oldest cuddle partner whose age I definitely know was 64. Age is just a number, and in my experience, is not a good predictor of the connection I might make with a given person. As someone said earlier, there are good and bad in all ages. Disclaimer: I have cuddled with OP and she is great. :-)

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    @UKGuy im very sure it does, but do you know 100% for fact that they do, like did they tell you specifically or you are just assuming from who they have had a session with through karma, because there are many factors that one weighs when booking with someone ...

  • [Deleted User]SuperSnuggler2 (deleted user)

    @quietman775 lol ... the “for an old broad” was silent, right?!??? 😉

  • GallowglassGallowglass

    @SuperSnuggler2 I did my research. The people I've worked with have been from a limited group of highly intelligent women. I don't, "just lay there". I like to share stories and discussions, arguments and creative passions. I would never let myself accidentally end up in that situation.
    If someone knows how to play, emotionally/intelligently (not, "play with one's emotions"), in a non-judgemental environment, then all of me engages and everything relaxes. So, I think preselecting for "fun" people has helped me avoid issues at any age. But, it does tend to filter out the people, pro or not, who are closer to my age.

  • littermatelittermate

    As one female enthusiast, I say, my preferred range is 40-100 but I'm open to who the human is. Honestly, age seems to have so much less to do with my cuddle partner choice than so many other parameters - like wholesomeness, health, maturity, openness, etc. Though I'm in contact with a few older guys who someday I may cuddle with, so far most of my cuddles have been with youngers because they are who have approached me.

    We are talking about something so personal. People have a lot of reasons why they want this not that. Many have to do with preconceived notions, which borders on discrimination, ("I just expect older women to be tired out old hags." or "I just expect young guys to be gropers and more awkward."), and often some of those attitudes have developed partially from experience. AND sometimes those preferences are just what we feel like will feed us most, free of preconceived notions and just based on what we're interested in at the moment.

    Luckily my self worth doesn't come from lots of men wanting to cuddle a 59 year old more than a 24 year old. I know I'm a luscious lump of embodied love and wisdom. Thank God.

  • GallowglassGallowglass

    Oh, and sorry to be crass, but trust the resting bitch face. It doesn't get better in person.

  • Lev136Lev136

    I've cuddled with both younger and older. Compatibility is more important than the age. Some don't get that.....

  • [Deleted User]SuperSnuggler2 (deleted user)
    edited February 2021

    @Gallowglass I 💯 agree with RBF. It’s crazy to me how few people smile in their profile pic. People always comment on my smile. 😄 Btw, I would not disappoint you and might even turn you for good... 😉 lol

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    but trust the resting bitch face. It doesn’t get better in person. @Gallowglass

    😅😂😂 ! Noted !!

  • cuddles_ndreamcuddles_ndream

    @Lev136 💯 !!!!!!!!!

  • [Deleted User]Mmart (deleted user)

    There are no cuddlers in my age group (plus or minus 5 yrs). The oldest person I have cuddled with was 51 and the youngest being a month shy of 20. Both individuals were remarkable people and cuddlers, each with their story that made the cuddle even more enjoyable. I have to say that cuddling with such a much younger person took a lot of conversation and thought prior to any session. Since that time I have cuddled with many in their 20's and 30's. I have learned that when everything is above board, both parties acting maturely and in good faith, then age is inconsequential.

  • GallowglassGallowglass

    @SuperSnuggler2 I'll swing by and hold you to that, some day.

  • [Deleted User]SuperSnuggler2 (deleted user)

    @Gallowglass bring it. I promise it will be a life-changing experience. I’ve made men weep from happiness when cuddling them... 😎

  • GallowglassGallowglass

    (puts on boots)

  • DeathbyChocolatDeathbyChocolat

    I’m personally uncomfortable with cuddling man who are to older than me some dudes be pushing there luck ie weird cuddling position or trying to grind on you and are really weird acting when messaging you I do think that people who are touched starve may also be sex starved and there using this as an excuse and that’s super sad :( this isn’t a dating or hooking up. Site but I’m sure people abuse the loopholes

  • xandriarainxandriarain

    This is something I worry about a lot. I love being a professional cuddler and its by far the best job I ever had and I want to do this until I can retire. I am terrified of aging out of cuddling and not getting enough clients to do this on a full time basis. Even if I manage to age like Hallie Berry some people just filter by age and will discriminate based on the number. I honestly wish age wasn’t even listed.

  • Jascuddleboo32Jascuddleboo32

    Age isn't an issue for me, but I prefer cuddling at my age group or younger. Older than me is fine too, but you gotta be a cutie. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. I won't deal with fake people or liars.

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