What to wear when cuddling?

Morpheus

Btw Johnny9inch chose that name because he's a huge fan of the group, Nine Inch Nails.

@CuddleBunny88 Great point about women's safety. Many push the boundaries already, which makes us feel uncomfortable. Expectations that Susie will do something because Sally will also cause an unfair playing field. However, frankly I don't want the men who would ask for the non-condoned "extras" as my clients, anyway...

@MrSoloDolo I'm with you on this in principle, for sure.

PotatoHead

Just my opinion but cuddling can be risky for both involved. Yes, women take a big chance with the issues of boundaries but men can also fall victim to false allegations. So just out of curiosity, how can this be resolved because from the first moment I stumbled across cuddling with a stranger, it has been on the back of my mind. Thanks. 

Morpheus

@lotsofcuddles are you talking specifically about pros, non pros or either? 

PotatoHead

@MrSoloDolo - Thank you and that question was directed at pros and non pros. I always trust until given a reason not to and would never hurt anyone intentionally but living in New York is a place that will definitely have a person questioning everything. Well, it does for me anyway and I have witness some very peculiar behavior so please forgive me if I felt the need to ask that question. 

I spent my entire life being a good person, hard working man and I have never been in trouble with the law but with one unstable cuddler, all of that can quickly changed and a life now in ruins. 

I find myself in a very difficult situation. I want to feel loved, trusted and have the companionship but is risk worth the reward. I had a session with one charming, sweet lady that I feel comfortable with so when I think about it, I will probably be seeing her exclusively. Since I'm fairly new, my question was just one of several. 

funandadventure

Dear All, this is way off post, there are posts about this, can we get back on post.
Love and friendship John Auckland NZ.

cutegurlchloe

Hey guys, I'm new to this.  At first I thought this was silly, but it's actually really interesting.  I have one concern though.  Can you be naked while doing this WITHOUT having sex?

I_am_Polylover

@cutegurlchloe Yes you can, however, don't even think of suggesting it to anyone on this site.  This site is only about fully clothed platonic cuddling.
♥Jim

PotatoHead

@I_am_Polylover, @cutegurlchloe - I agree. This site is not for that type of cuddling and can only lead to problems. At one point, I was wondering the same thing but soon realized that that type of cuddling can lead to a situation you don't want or need. Be mutually comfortable but clothed. 

Edward3123

Hello, I'm new. I think it would be something you would share with a long time client and I'm not talking a few months.  I've cuddled with other nude and nothing happened, they were long time friends though. I see that being a big problem with someone you barely know. I'm not bashing anyone because you could be that discipline, however, I think I would have something pop up. It wouldn't be anything we couldn't talk through. 

Ok everyone, new and not: READ the Client Agreement. Topless/nude cuddling is NOT allowed. Period, the end. This is not a place to discuss the whys and wherefores of activities that are not condoned by the site.

jeanpierre

@Mark, I think it's time to close this thread. What more can possibly be discussed?

funandadventure

@mark I think this post should be allowed to carry on as it is a good reference for new members and allows them to see what has been said, since we are getting so many new friends daily, this is a good start.
Love and peace John NZ.

@Mark as a fairly new person on this site I agree that it is a good reference    

PotatoHead

I see the actual act of topless/nude cuddling to be prohibited but not a simple, adult discussion that is educational and informative. Are we to assume that people are not allowed to be open and discuss a topic they may have on their mind? I read the Terms & Conditions and didn't obverse anything about this topic being forbidden within a discussion. At the very beginning of the Terms & Conditions, one will find that it states Adults Users Only.

Well, since we are all adults and this is an adult topic, with each person rightfully entitled to have a different opinion and the right to speak freely without any fear of negative repercussions, I don't see what the issue is and certainly never expected this type of closed mindedness from certain individuals, especially professionals. I'm new and still learning. 

Now I was informed that my username has been flagged and I'm being watched. I'm sorry but I find it a bit hypocritical that women can speak all these wish about "boners" but if a man mentions anything that just one woman finds offensive, in her opinion, the discussion is closed without hesitation. 

i also read a thread where women discussed the fear and run the risk of boundaries being violated and not respected, which is a shame and should never happen but I felt compelled to add that this type of service is a two way street and that it was important for good men to know that we too run the risk of being falsely accused and with that, can lead to multiple serious legal problems. What we learned is that risk runs both ways and that proper screening and trust must be mutual and gives everyone something to think about. 

These are topics that I believe should be discussed and openly shared. I for one will never intentionally hurt anyone and as mentioned, we're all adults here. I would hate to live in fear of sharing my thoughts and any questions I may have. I have read threads I don't particularly care for but I respect the opinions of others. I simply do not participate. 

Sorry, just openly sharing how I feel. Please reconsider as many of us are good people with good intentions. I can't expect everyone to agree with me but at the same time, I don't believe it benefits anyone by being silenced. 

What's even more upsetting is that I recently deleted my account because I felt uncomfortable and unwelcomed. Also, since I was informed that I was flagged and being watched, I honestly believed it was only a matter time that I was removed, all for simply taking part in topics that pertained to the health benefits of platonic skin to skin contact. 

It's heartbreaking to think that a site which enforces the benefits of cuddling would, to a degree, condem it at the same time. 

Completely agree @jeanpierre. It's just a broken record at this point.

Mark

@lotsofcuddles Your account was not being monitored. This is a community forum and therefore it must allow for respectful and honest debate. 

Ok! So Mark gave the "free speech" reasoning (in an email to me) nude cuddling topic, so I've started a new discussion just about that, if you'd like to openly talk about it and not have it hidden underneath talk of leggings and whatnot.

I thought there was a particular direction the site was going in and wanted to defend that, but hey!

PotatoHead

@Mark - Thank you very, very much. Unfortunately, I heard otherwise from one particular woman on here but I will not mention her by name. I don't think I need to. Anyway, I'm delighted to see the level of maturity and the ability to discuss certain topics, open expression and the educational value taking a turn in its rightful direction.

I also believe it's an intelligent decision if you wish for this site to grow and thrive. I enjoy it here and would even be willing to pay for this service but once I believe I am unable to openly discuss my thought without them being scrutinized by an opinionated individual, I see no point in continuing. 

However, I am now going reinstate my membership, thanks to you Mark.

mellow

@lotsofcuddles , that was your first mistake. You need not to listen to anybody on the site but Mark. I think we are all adults and we can have a healthy and open discussion about cuddle clothing without problems and if somebody wants to share their opinion about topless or nude cuddling then they should be able to express those as well.
I saw a response above in this thread that brought up the cuddling agreement and as far as I know and understand that applies to pro cuddlers and their clients not to regular CC users although I would agree that is a good set of guidelines for cuddle buddies. 
So I think the discussion should be continued in this thread and all opinions heard and discussed in a friendly manner.

PotatoHead

@mellow - Thank you for your advice and input, I couldn't agree more. As I have often mentioned, this is all fairly new to me. Not the act of cuddling per say, but this type of service. 

I'm also learning about the health benefits associated with cuddling and I never hide the fact that I'm a stage IV esophageal cancer survivor. In fact, I took part in a four hour session with a professional last week and showed her proof. 

I have learned and continue to learn from the kindness and knowledge of others as well as through independent research. I enjoy learning and sharing and I never, ever wish to be viewed as a bad individual. I may voice my ideas and opinions but all boundaries are highly respected and always will be. 

Sideon

Late to the game here, but when it cools down this fall, I'm very interested in a tiger onesie. Yes, serious. My godson has one and I TOTALLY want one for cuddle-fests.

Morpheus

Tiger..... woods onesies???

Sideon

Uhm, no.

This. Or something like it.

Karyn

I agree with some of the previous posters that at the end of the day it is up to both cuddlers and their level of comfort.

Me personally I am in Florida and the humidity sucks lol. I like wearing loose fitting comfortable clothing like a cotton dress or maybe my onesie if it's later in the night. I get cold easily but sometimes skin to skin makes you feel sticky when you "unpeel" from the other person haha

lydia1979

I aspire to clothes-free living so i am more than comfortable being nude. Having said that i would probably cuddle clothed with someone new for the first few times at least.

I_am_Polylover

@lydia1979 I totally agree with you except for one clarification. I would never expect anyone from this site to cuddle nude with me. Even asking someone here if they are interested in it, without expecting them to do it with you can have bad repercussions. I was attacked here repeatedly for doing just that.

Jim

PotatoHead

Yes, a few of us have been attacked while covering this topic so I'm not going to write much but I do enjoy adding my opinion. Personally, I have come to the conclusion that a person should simply wear whatever makes them comfortable.

My last cuddle consisted of gym shorts and a tee shirt, which I believe was appropriate, especially in this weather. My cuddle partner wore shorts and a tee shirt without a bra and that actually made me feel good because I felt trusted and it had to have been more comfortable for her. Contrary to what some may believe, it's not a big deal. Again, just wear what's comfortable for you.

CarlosHunt

@PotatoHead- I had the exact same experience with my last pro cuddle buddy (maybe we saw the same person ..LOL). She was totally comfortable in a yoga shirt /no bra and yoga shorts, and so was I. No boundaries were crossed. Honestly, since I am paying for this service, then I certainly prefer to be comfortable during a session.

PotatoHead

@CarlosHunt - Thank you and I'm glad I'm not the only person on here that feels this way. What woman honestly enjoys wearing a bra, especially in this weather and while trying to experience a comfortable session?

The professional I spent time with used to wear one and I can agree with that while trust is being developed but if a client becomes a trusted repeat, I would hope the professional feels comfortable enough to ditch the bra. It's obvious we are not here in hopes of a sexual encounter.

I'm older, I know what they look like, feel like and what their purpose is. It's not a big deal unless it's made to be a big deal. For me, they are a comfort, not sexual and yes, they are still under fabric. I can hop on any subway train or simply walk down a street in Manhattan and see lots of braless women. It doesn't even phase me. If I'm cuddling, I would like to feel a smooth bare back, not a bullet proof vest.

In my opinion, if a professional is that uncomfortable with trying to be comfortable, perhaps she shouldn't be in this type of service to begin with. I don't want to be with anyone if they cringe during a session of hide. This is a up close and personal service.

I have spent thousands of dollars on professional cuddle sessions and if I get a sense that I'm not accepted nor trusted and she's trying hard or is uncomfortable in general, I no longer bother with them. There are some women on here that are actually very cool and some have even admitted to me that they hate wearing a bra but do so anyway out of fear of making the client feel awkward.

It's their body and I would never force a woman to do anything that makes her feel uncomfortable, I'm not here for that and I don't want that kind of a session but at the same time, I'm the client and yes, I would like a session that makes me feel good and trusted. I would hope the professional would too.

I'll tell you one thing, if I was a young attractive woman, I'd be making a financial killing cuddling and I'd be comfortable as hell doing so.