About me
My name is Kelly, and I moved to Texas from Florida last year! I came in search of a little more happiness & a little less chaos. If I’m lucky, maybe even a good balance of both 💜 💚 Laughing is one of my favorite things to do, my sense of humor is definitely my best quality. I have jokes of every genre on demand. Go ahead, ask me for one 💃🏻 I LOVE music, I enjoy all genres but I'm definitely a heavy metal kind of girl. I’m an Anime, Horror & Sci-Fi movie fanatic! I’m always looking for the scariest and most mind-bending things to watch. I’ve been called weird or strange many times in my life, it’s now one of my favorite compliments. My brain is made up of famous quotes, movie quotes, lists, useless information, poetry, song lyrics, jokes, riddles, questions, fiction novels, strange but true facts, and pick up lines. I have an unhealthy obsession with words and nice pens. All these words take up so much space in my head, that I can’t remember how to drive very well. In case you haven't figured it out yet, I’m a dangerous woman.
Meeting people I can connect with and share stimulating conversation with, is exciting! I enjoy picking apart the human brain and learning it on a deeper level. I often skip the small talk and dive right into your psyche, be prepared for questions 🥸 During my sessions, I’ve became a friend, a partner, a comedian, even a therapist. I’m really good at figuring out your needs, being a fun distraction, alleviating stress, providing a beautiful & fun environment, offering an ear for listening and mouth for wisdom, I might have the advice you need after a fight with your wife, maybe you need a fairly skilled massage after working a 12 hour day, I’ll even take a photo with you to post online for your EX to see, we may excitedly exchange life stories or reminisce about our past, maybe you just miss holding a woman, I’ll learn everything I can about you including your aunts daughters new boyfriends dogs name, or that Hector is running three Honda Civics with Spoon engines, on top of that, he just went into Harry's and bought three T66 turbos with NOS and a Motec system exhaust, and sometimes we’ll spend hours howling with laughter or giggling under the blanket, but you will always leave in better condition than you arrived 💚💜
I do genuinely love touch, to be held, to hold, and to cuddle. But for me, it’s so much more than that! Taking away someone’s sadness, loneliness, or social anxiety, brings me a feeling of fulfillment. I think genuine love and affection lean towards a level of intimacy, kindness, and empathy that many of us find lacking, as well as yearn for, especially in today’s climate of political and social unrest. I find that I am easily able to connect with people on a physical & emotional basis that ensures calmness and peace, simply because I feel happiest when I’m helping others access a frequency of relaxation, peace, and gentleness. Physical touch has always been a valued love language of mine, and as I've grown, I’ve found it to be one of the most healing and therapeutic acts one can do.
🥷🏻Send me a really cool fact about space or psychology for 5% off! 🥷🏻
🚫🚫🚫 Strictly Platonic! This service is 100% NON-SEXUAL. You can’t change my mind, “accidentally” touch my boobies, guilt trip me, tread that fine line called my boundaries, or put a price on my dignity. Do NOT show up to my house and disrespect me, I will roundhouse your @$$, end the session, and you will NOT be refunded 🚫🚫🚫