Frequently Asked Questions

edited August 2022 in General


General   ~   what this site is about
Profiles   ~   presenting yourself
Searching and messages   ~   contacting other people
Cuddling   ~   how to cuddle
Karma   ~   giving feedback
Professionals   ~   paid cuddling
Resources   ~   resources about cuddling
Website   ~   history and member info
Forums   ~   participating in the forums
Reporting: - when & how to report & privacy



  • edited March 2022


    Is this real?
    Yes! This site is intended as a safe environment for those who want to cuddle others in a platonic, non-sexual way, without the expectation of anything more.

    How does it work?
    Search your area by clicking on Cuddlers on the top search bar, then browse through the profiles that come up. Click on Send Message on someone's profile page to contact them. After getting to know them, arrange a time and place to meet (often in public for the first time).

    Then if both people feel comfortable, cuddle!

    Is it free?
    There are two kinds of members on this site: enthusiasts and professionals. Professionals (or "pros") have a "P" at the top right of their photo in the search results, and have fees listed on their profile. Non-professionals are not permitted to charge for cuddling.

    Is it safe?
    No background checks are performed, but people are fairly vigilant about reporting and banning those who violate the Terms of Service. Nevertheless, it is wise to be careful. If someone raises red flags for you, go with your intuition and decline to cuddle with them.

    General safety tips: take some time getting to know the other person; discuss boundaries and expectations before cuddling; meet publicly first; maybe let a friend know where you are (and check in with them afterwards); avoid relying on other people for transport home unless you know them already.

    One enthusiast offers strategies for women (and men) to help screen potential cuddlers.

    Is this a good place to find a date?
    Cuddle Comfort is a place to gain access to platonic touch without having to be in a relationship. People have been banned for treating it as a dating site. There are plenty of other places to look for dates on the internet.

    What kinds of people are here?
    Generally people who are missing touch in their lives, but some people are here because they are aware of the need and want to give to others.

    Possible reasons for missing touch are many: a recent breakup, being single but not wanting to be in a relationship, being away from home for extended periods and so on. Some aren't necessarily feeling a lack of touch in their lives, they just love cuddling!

    There is a series of member interviews that may give some insight into what the people here are like.

    Are there conditions for joining?
    Members must be 18 or over, and may only create a single profile. The Terms of Service state:

    "You agree to never use this Website for the intent of meeting another member for sex. You also agree to never attempt to progress a meeting, organised via this website, to a sexual nature. When communicating with another member, you agree to never indicate a desire to cuddle while doing any of the following: (1) being nude, (2) wearing only underwear, (3) kissing, (4) groping, (5) satisfying a fetish or kink, and (6) anything of a non-platonic nature."

    Professional cuddlers agree to the cuddler contract. In addition, persons who offer non-platonic services on other wesbites may not be listed as professionals on this site (see this post).

    Why the emphasis on being platonic?
    Touch is a valuable thing people are often missing in their lives, but is not always available outside the context of sex and romance. Knowing that others are on the same page and are not looking for a dating relationship or to hook up, just the comfort and nurture that comes from platonic touch, makes this is safe environment for those who aren't seeking anything further.

    In short, this isn't a dating site, just place where people can find cuddles without the need to be in a relationship first.

    How can I learn more about the site?
    To get a feel for this site and what goes on here, take a look through these forum threads:

    Cuddling Discussions and Resources
    Member interviews

    What are some benefits of cuddling?
    Cuddling gives a sense of connection with other human beings. It can be therapeautic, comforting and healing, reduce stress and help people sleep, increase confidence (especially in interacting with the gender you cuddle with), help with people's body image, relieve depression and anxiety, communicate a sense of being accepted and valued, and leave a peaceful feeling that can last for days or weeks.

    Affectionate touch releases hormones like oxytocin and dopamine, which can give a "cuddle high". Oxytocin is also involved in emotional bonding and helps people feel safe to lower their guard, which creates a sense of closeness when cuddling someone.

    See also these comments from @Lorelei about the medical benefits of touch.
  • edited January 2021


    What makes a good profile?
    The "About Me" section of your profile is important to fill in, since it helps people decide if you are a good fit for them as a cuddler. It doesn't need to be an essay, but some things to communicate might be: what brought you here (why you are interested in cuddling); the kind of person you are; something unique about you. Some people also mention that they are only interested in something platonic and non-sexual. While this is always expected, explicitly stating it might provide some reassurance.

    It can be inspiring to look at other people's profiles, but avoid copying their exact words. It will make you seem inauthentic and is seen as plagiarism.

    Should I say who I am looking for?
    It's perfectly OK to say "I prefer not to cuddle people in relationships" or "I am only comfortable with my own age group" and so on. But be aware that certain preferences such as for appearance or race can come across as prejudice or sound like you are looking for a date.

    Do I need a photo?
    Most people expect to be able to see a photo of someone they are planning to cuddle, partly so they can get an idea of who they are, and partly so they can identify them when they meet.

    If you have privacy concerns it is possible to make photos private or friends-only, which will subsequently add a padlock logo to your placeholder image. Alternatively, you can attach an image to a message.

    What kind of photo is best?
    A photo can say a lot: that you are friendly, open, warm, interesting, out there, humorous, adventurous ... people are drawn to all kinds of things, so most photos are fine.

    Avoid provocative photos such as shirtless ones for men or a focus on cleavage for women. These can attract unsafe people and give the wrong message to people visiting the site.

    Note that a "reverse image search" can be used to find photos on the web, so avoid using photos from your social media sites etc.

    How do I upload a photo? NEW
    In your profile, select "edit profile" then "edit photos".

    There should be an option to "upload from your device" - choose that, then select the photo you want to upload. Then click the "upload photo" button. It should upload and show three vertical dots on the left bottom, and a star on the right bottom of the picture. The three dots are to adjust privacy for public, friends-only, or private (which you can choose to share later - or not). The star will make that picture your primary photo.

    Why are there questions unrelated to cuddling?
    The profile questions are intended to give others an idea of the kind of person you are and what you might have in common with them. Feel free to ignore ones that don't seem relevant.

    What are host, guest and public?
    Host means you can provide a place to cuddle, guest means you are willing to travel to another person's place (or somewhere else like a hotel) and public includes places like a park or cinema.

    Do people cuddle outside their age bracket?
    Most people don't state an age preference, although they may have one in practice.

    While it can be helpful to have a shared culture in common with a cuddle partner, the kinds of connections formed through cuddling tend to transcend age differences pretty easily. It is important to be comfortable with whoever you are cuddling, which might mean staying within your own age group. But consider being adventurous and meeting with older or younger cuddlers; people are just people!

    A very narrow range (such as 18-20) can sound like you are looking for a date rather than a platonic cuddle.

    What are people in relationships doing on this site?
    Since cuddling (as promoted by this site) is a strictly platonic activity, people who are in a relationship can be here perfectly legitimately. They may have a partner who is averse to touch, or medically unable to be close for very long, or with a very different capacity or need for touch. People who travel for work can also miss touch while they are away from their partner. Perhaps they just love cuddling everyone, and their partner is fine with that.

    Some members have said that cuddling other people has had a positive impact on their relationship with their partner – because they aren't depending so much on them to meet their touch needs, and are generally more fulfilled and happy in life.

    If you are in a relationship, it is highly recommended that you be completely open with your partner about cuddling other people so as to avoid any sense of "emotional cheating".

    How do I view a particular user's profile?
    To see someone's profile, just put their user name after

    For example:

    Why are all these people looking at my profile?
    If you click on Visitors you can see a list of users who have viewed your profile recently. Don't let it concern you if it includes people you are not interested in cuddling; they didn't necessarily find you while searching for someone to cuddle.

    There can be all kinds of reasons why someone might view your profile: you said something interesting on the forum and they wanted to learn more about you; they are just interested in people's profiles; or they might even have clicked on your name by mistake (easy to do on a mobile phone).

    What if I notice an inappropriate profile?
    If you see a profile (or profile photo) that seems inappropriate for a G rated cuddling site, you can report it by going to the profile page and clicking on "...", then selecting Report.

    Alternatively, post a message on the Inappropriate profiles forum thread.

    Can I change my username?
    You can change your username from the Settings page. Usernames may be changed at most once per year, except for special circumstances (contact Cuddle Comfort and your request will be considered).
  • edited June 2021

    Searching and messages

    How do you find people to cuddle? What does "P" or a star on photos mean?
    Search your area by clicking on Cuddlers on the top search bar, then browse through the profiles that come up. Click on a photo to view someone's profile, then click on the Send Message button to contact them (or the Request to Book button for professionals - it does exactly the same thing).

    A pink "P" on a photo means the user is a professional and charges a fee for cuddling.

    A star means they are a professional with at least 5 karma comments (see Karma), with an average rating of 5 stars. The number in parentheses is the total number of karma comments they have.

    What is the best way to approach someone?
    A common mistake in a first message is to ask someone to cuddle straight away. Although the whole purpose of this site is to connect people who want to cuddle, there are quite a few things to weigh up before someone decides to meet with a stranger: Are they safe? Are they only looking for cuddles, or something more? Do I feel OK about being in a vulnerable and intimate situation with them? Would we connect well and enjoy spending time with each other?

    A better approach is to take time getting to know the other person. Ask questions; show that you have read their profile; be friendly. Avoid compliments about appearance, since it can sound like you are looking for a date.

    Many professionals don't mind being asked about their availability to cuddle in the first message, but will still want to get a sense of who you are and what you are looking for in your time with them. Other pros prefer taking time to get to know their clients first.

    I can't send any messages!
    There is a limit on the number of people you can message per day, which is set to a low value for new members but increases over time. This is just to prevent spam.

    Help! I'm getting too many messages!
    New members (female enthusiasts in particular) sometimes receive a large number of messages soon after joining.

    Hopefully this isn't too overwhelming, and you can still make some good connections here. Maybe focus on just a few people at a time. One option is to send a brief reply to the others saying that you have too many messages to respond to at the moment and you might be able to talk some time in the future.

    You can also use the Mute function to avoid appearing in other people's searches temporarily (under Settings -> Privacy).

    Why are there no replies to my messages?
    It's probably nothing to do with you; it can just take a lot of patience to connect with people on this site.

    If your messages are friendly and not immediately asking to cuddle, and the "About me" section of your profile is filled in, and you have a photo (or one is available on request) – then you have done what you can.

    If you have only been messaging enthusiasts, consider seeing a professional. Apart from pros being more likely to respond to messages, cuddling a professional gives you an opportunity to receive karma, which will let others know that you are a trustworthy person.

    Why do guys ask if I am "available for a session"?
    They may be assuming that you are a professional. It's not an insult, but it does mean they aren't the kind of person who pays attention to what is written in a person's profile.

    What can you do about inappropriate messages?
    If someone is harassing you, you can report them by visiting their profile then clicking on the "..." button, then selecting Report. Alternatively, you can report them using the Contact form.

    To stop receiving messages from a user, select the Block option (which prevents them from seeing your profile too).

    Someone who isn't a professional said they charge for cuddling. Is that allowed?
    No; this is known as being an "untagged pro". You can report them by visiting their profile and clicking on the "..." button, then selecting Report. They will be informed by the admins that in order to be a paid cuddler they need to sign up as a professional.

    The fee professionals pay goes towards maintaining the site, and is not unreasonable to ask in return for the exposure they gain here.

    Is it OK to contact a professional just to chat?
    Even though the button on a Professional's page says Request to Book, you can still use it to send normal messages.

    Many professionals are happy enough to receive a "hello" message from anybody, including people too far away to cuddle. You might develop a friendship with them, and maybe meet and cuddle one day. But if you come across as wanting to date or just flirt with them, you may find yourself being reported.

    Should I be concerned if someone wants to talk off site?
    It may or may not be a red flag if someone wants to talk off site. Some people simply prefer voice or video chat as a way to evaluate and get to know the other person. But it can also be a way of avoiding the Cuddle Comfort message system when a person is looking for something non-platonic (since messages can be used as evidence).

    For professionals, the Cuddler Contract states: "All contact with the Client, including scheduling, should remain on our website unless absolutely necessary." However it can be helpful to exchange phone numbers (or some other means of quick communication) in case there is a last minute issue. Some people have a second phone or use something like Google Voice to avoid giving out their personal phone number.

    What are private and friend photos? How do I send photos to people?
    When you upload a photo to this site (via the Edit Photos tab on the Edit Profile page), you can mark it as either "public", "friends" or "private". Anyone can see your public photos; only people in your friends list can see "friends" photos; and no one can normally see your private photos.

    There is an icon at the bottom right corner of the message box that allows you to attach photos to a message. Clicking on it brings up a menu with options: My Library, My Device and From URL. The last two let you select a single photo, either from your device or a website. The My Library option allows you to send or give people access to your non-public photos. The options are:

    Grant access to all private photos: Share private photos.
    Grant access to all friends-only photos: Share friends-only photos (only shown if they are not already on your friends list).
    Attach specific photos to your message: Select individual photos to share.

    What does being "muted" mean?
    Someone can mute their account to temporarily hide their profile in searches and prevent new people from messaging them. Muting ends automatically after one week (or when the person chooses to end it).
  • edited July 2020


    What are some different ways to cuddle?
    Some common positions are: spooning (both lying facing the same direction, with the "big spoon" embracing the "little spoon"); lying face to face; head on their lap or chest; mama/papa bear (sitting in front of them facing the same direction), and many others.

    See the forum post on How to cuddle for more ideas, and some of the videos in the Resources section of this FAQ.

    How does public cuddling work?
    Public cuddling can either take place somewhere outside, like a park or zoo, or indoors such as a cinema or concert. Sunsets and beaches can be a relaxing setting too. Some cuddling possibilities are: arms around shoulders, holding hands, walking arm in arm, looking into each other's eyes or lying down on a blanket.

    See the last few links in the Cuddle sessions forum post for more ideas.

    How do I prepare for a cuddle?
    Just use basic hygiene: shower, brush your teeth, shave stubble and wear fresh clothes.

    People usually avoid perfume and cologne. If you do want to wear a scent, it's a good idea to check with your cuddle partner first (some people have allergies).

    What do people wear when cuddling?
    Wear whatever is comfortable; at minimum, shorts and a tee shirt or tank top. Some people wear pajamas or yoga pants.

    Skin on skin contact can be very beneficial and releases oxytocin, but note that the phrase "lots of skin contact" can be interpreted as sexually oriented, even if it is innocently intended.

    Both the Terms of service (for everyone on this site) and the Client Service Agreement (for professionals and clients) disallow cuddling nude or in underwear only.

    What if I become aroused and get an erection?
    Arousal while cuddling happens sometimes, and is not something to be too concerned about; physical reactions are not always indicative of a person's mental state. Maybe change positions to avoid direct contact in the "hip" area, or take some time out. The bottom line is that when someone feels aroused they do not have to act on it. Some related forums threads:

    Arousal during cuddling?
    HONEST question need HONEST answers ONLY please

    What if someone pushes boundaries or makes me uncomfortable?
    Always speak up if you feel uncomfortable. Discussing boundaries before cuddling is important, but even if you haven't talked about them you always have the right to say no to something you are uncomfortable with.

    Hopefully you never find yourself in such a situation, but if you feel disrespected or unsafe, just end the cuddle; it may not seem like a "nice" thing to do, but your safety is your number one concern.

    If someone acts inappropriately towards you, please report them. This makes the site safer for everyone. You can do this by visiting their profile and clicking on the "..." button, then selecting Report. Alternatively, use the Contact form to report them.

    How do platonic cuddling relationships work?
    It can be an adjustment for some people to experience physical closeness without there being a romantic element. But hopefully you'll get the hang of it after a cuddle or two!

    Some things that can help keep things platonic include: having multiple cuddle partners (which is also helpful in case someone becomes unavailable for some reason, such as moving away); maybe avoid cuddling people you feel a strong attraction to; clearly discuss boundaries before cuddling.

    It is unwise to go into a cuddle expecting it to lead to a romantic relationship:

    "If one person goes into the session with even a small hope of it becoming something more though, it can lead to a disaster for both people as one may develop feelings for the other and the other person thinks they will be staying as a platonic friendship. That can mean the loss of someone you thought wanted only a cuddle partner like you and they ended up wanting more, ruining it for both of you."@reurbo in this forum post.

    Cuddle Comfort has no desire to police people's relationships. If after getting to know each other two cuddlers want to change their relationship to a romantic one, they can obviously do that. But platonic relationships can be just as rewarding and fulfilling as other kinds, so be open to the possibility of forming deep and lasting connections based on something other than romance.

    How do I ask a friend to cuddle who is unfamiliar with it?
    One approach is to bring up the topic of platonic cuddling and its benefits without directly asking the friend if they want to cuddle, then gauge their reaction to see if it is something they might be open to. Most people associate cuddling with romance, so it might take a little education for them to think differently about it.

    See this forum post for some more thoughts.
  • edited July 2020


    What is karma?
    Karma is feedback from other cuddlers. You can see someone's karma by clicking on the Karma tab on their profile. Professionals tend to have the most karma, but the system is intended for everyone.

    As well as comments, karma uses a rating system of 1-5 stars. In practice, most karma is either 5 star (a positive experience) or occasionally 1 star (such as someone not turning up at all).

    How do I leave someone karma?
    After two members have both sent each other three messages, the ability to leave karma for the other person is unlocked. Go to their profile and click on the Karma tab, and you can enter a comment and a star rating.

    It is also possible to reply to the karma comments someone has left you.

    Can I change the karma I have left someone?
    Karma comments may be edited for a short time after you have left them, or deleted at any time.

    What if someone leaves me unfair karma?
    If you feel that someone has left you unfair karma (such as a negative comment without having met in person), you can explain the issue using the Contact form.

    Are there any issues with the karma system?
    Sometimes people (particularly professionals) can feel pressure to leave positive karma in order to receive good karma in return, even if the other person acted inappropriately. There are plans to modify the karma system to address this issue.
  • edited May 2023


    Do professional cuddlers provide more intimate services?
    No; this is an entirely G rated service. Although cuddling involves being physically close to someone, the intention is not to arouse but to provide a therapeutic, comforting and relaxing experience without sexuality coming into the picture.

    This is something Cuddle Comfort takes very seriously, and members who seek or offer sexual services are quickly banned.

    Why are there paid cuddlers? Shouldn't cuddling be free?
    In an ideal world, everyone would have someone available to cuddle. Professional cuddlers meet the needs of those who are not in such a situation. Being paid as cuddlers gives them the time and resources to be available to many more people than they otherwise would.

    Some advantages of seeing a professional are: you are more likely to get a response when messaging them; you probably won't have to wait long before cuddling; the platonic nature of the relationship is clear; and you get to be the "focus of the cuddle".

    What are you paying for with a professional?
    In the words of @HugsFromFei: "When you hire me for this service, I'd like you to know that all you are paying for is my time, my full attention, and my skills. The love and care I have for you comes from the heart. It can't be bought, and is absolutely free."

    Why are some prices higher than others?
    Professionals are free to choose their own rates. The standard rate is $80 per hour. Some charge a higher amount, which can limit the number of clients. Others start at a lower than average rate then increase it gradually as they become more established.

    How do you pay?
    Normally clients pay in cash at the start of the session. Some professionals may ask for a deposit in advance (particularly if they have experienced many cancellations in the past). Tipping is not expected.

    Do clients pay for travel time?
    Professionals charge for travel time at their own discretion; rates may be listed on their profile page.

    What if the client or professional has to cancel?
    In practice, if someone needs to cancel then the session is usually rescheduled for another time; people are usually understanding. Please contact the other person as soon as possible so they can make other arrangements.

    Cuddle Comfort does not have an official cancellation policy, but the Client Service Agreement suggests that the client pays half the session price if they cancel within 12 hours, and pays for any rental space if they cancel within 24 hours. If the professional cancels within 24 hours, they are encouraged to give a discount on the next session.

    As a professional, if someone owes you compensation for a cancellation, we recommend reporting the user so we can check into their history.

    What are the rules for professionals and clients? What happens if they are broken?
    Clients are required to follow the Client Service Agreement, and professionals agree to the Cuddler Contract. This includes: no sexual activity; both parties remain clothed; not touching areas normally covered by undergarments; no kissing; cleanliness and adequate hygiene.

    If necessary, you can report someone by visiting their profile and clicking on the "..." button then selecting Report. Alternatively, use the Contact form to report them. Someone who has violated the site rules is likely to be banned (after investigation).

    Professionals have a right to end a session without refund if they feel the client is not abiding by the Client Service Agreement.

    What if I get too attached or fall in love?
    It is natural to feel close to someone you cuddle; oxytocin (a hormone released through touch) produces a sense of emotional bonding, and people tend to open up when they cuddle. See the question "How do platonic cuddling relationships work?" under Cuddling.

    However, it isn't a crime to feel something for the person you are cuddling. They may or may not reciprocate; in the case of a professional, they probably won't. But it can be a safe context to talk about such things without feeling rejected.

    See also: Help! I've fallen in love with my professional cuddler.

    A professional isn't replying. Aren't they meant to accept everyone?
    On the one hand, a requirement for becoming a professional is that they "are accepting of all races, ages, genders, and sexual orientations" and "can be affectionate to anyone".

    On the other hand, pros are told that "it's your choice who you accept with no pressure from us. This means you can slowly build your clientele with only those you feel most comfortable with."

    So professionals are not actually required to cuddle everyone who asks. They are in the position of having to evaluate who would make a good client and who would not, and sometimes they might err on the side of caution while doing so.

    What are some qualities of a good professional?
    Qualities that clients value include: being on time; being caring and compassionate; making the client the center of attention; being skilled at cuddling; good conversation (or just comfortable quietness); being nurturing and therapeutic; enjoying the cuddle as well; being authentic.

    There have also been some negative experiences reported, such as: cancelling at the last minute; being unresponsive (like a "dead fish"); being distracted while cuddling; clients feeling like the session ended too abruptly.

    How do I become a professional?
    The steps for becoming a professional are outlined on this page.

    Some people become professionals without really knowing what they are getting into. The posts on professional cuddling and part 2 may be helpful.

    Are there male professionals?
    There are male paid cuddlers, but they are relatively rare (about 3% of professionals). It has been observed that most of a male pro's clients are likely to be men.

    How much do professionals pay to the site?
    Female professionals pay 15% of their fee to the site, and male professionals have a fixed fee per month. The reason for the different pricing structures is explained in this thread.

    Can a professional still cuddle for free?
    Yes, on rare occasions. But they should be very clear about this in messages to the client so as to reduce the chance of a moderator finding the activity suspicious, then make a booking with a $0 custom price.

    Can professionals provide add-on services?
    Yes, in some cases. You can read the website's official policy and guidance here.
  • edited July 2020


    Are there any books on cuddling?
    The Cuddle Sutra by Rob Grader.
    Touch: The Power of Human Connection by Samantha Hess.
    The Snuggle Party Guidebook by Dave Wheitner.
    The Book of Cuddles by Dr. Yoni Alkan.

    Unreleased books (due near the end of 2018):

    Somebody Hold Me: The Single Person's Guide to Nurturing Human Touch by Epiphany Jordan.

    Are there any movies related to cuddling?
    Cuddle: A Documentary by Fast Lane Productions (forum thread here).

    Are there helpful YouTube videos?
    22 days of cuddle positions (about 1:00 each).
    How to cuddle a girl (forum thread here) (5:15).
    Professional Cuddler Amanda Anatra on The Scene (20:43).
    Becca Close "Professional Cuddler Wanted" at Ignite Boulder 30 (5:11).
    Rediscovering platonic touch | Janet Treviño | TEDxSanAntonio (12:34).

    Are there some cuddling blogs?
    There is a blog associated with this site (submit articles here):

    Some member sites with cuddling blogs and articles:


    Are there any cuddling events?
    CuddlExpo is on in Chicago, September 28th-30th 2018. It is mainly aimed at professionals, but there is a cuddling event open to everyone on each of the three days.

    There may also be cuddle parties in your local area.
  • edited November 2020


    How did the site get started, and who runs it?
    Cuddle Comfort has been around since March 2011, and was founded by @Mark, the site administrator. @Gary is the primary developer. @reurbo became a moderator in 2018, as did @SoulcuddlerZ in 2019, and @Sideon in November 2020.

    Mark said in an interview:

    "It was after my first relationship ended that I realised the importance of cuddling – or in my case, the sudden absence of it. It was around that time that I came up with the idea for this website."

    "The original intention was and still is for this website to be the community hub for cuddling enthusiasts around the world. Equally important is our mission to help people get a cuddle whenever they want without the typical requirement of being in a relationship first."

    How is it funded?
    The main revenue is from fees paid by professionals. The vast majority goes straight back into developing the website.

    Note that Cuddle Comfort does not attempt to recruit professionals from within the website; in fact the founder @Mark has a preference for more enthusiasts joining the site. (Sometimes a person might be contacted to clarify how to become a professional, but only if it is obvious that they joined with that intention; see this comment).

    How many members are there? What is the percentage of women and professionals?
    The site reached 100000 members in February 2018.

    About 21% of the members are women, and 4% are professionals. Around 97% of professionals are female.

    Which countries are the members in?
    Around 80% are from the United States, 6% from Canada, 5% from Great Britain and 2% from Australia. The other 7% are from all over the world.

    Within the United States, the state with the most members is California, followed by Texas. New York seems to have the most members out of any city, followed by Los Angeles.

    How many people join each month?
    In June-July 2018, there were over 3800 new users (22% female).

    There was an increase in the number of new members in August-September 2017:

    Do people tend to stay around?
    Over June-July 2018, about 100 people deactivated their accounts, and 250 people deleted them.

    Around 1 in 3 enthusiasts and 1 in 7 professionals appear to create accounts then not log in again after the first month (see this forum post).

    What are deactivated, deleted, banned and paused accounts?
    Deactivated means the person's account still exists, so they might be intending to come back in the future.

    Deleted usually means the person voluntarily removed their account.

    Banned means there was a serious violation of the terms of service and a moderator removed the account.

    Paused means that an account is temporarily suspended to clarify an issue or provide guidance. Paused accounts are usually restored after a short time.

    How do I deactivate or delete my account?
    You can temporarily deactivate or permanently delete your account from the Settings page.

    I have an idea for improving the website. Who do I tell?
    You can post suggestions on the forum thread: Criticisms and ways this website can be improved.

    What are some other statistics about the site?
    See the Cuddler statistics forum post.
  • edited July 2020


    What are the different forums for?
    The General forum is for discussing anything related to cuddling, although off topic discussions appear too.

    The Cuddle Requests forum is a place to find cuddlers in a particular area, although you may have more success by contacting people directly.

    The Professional Cuddling forum is for discussing topics related to paid cuddling, and is intended for clients as well as professionals. Other people with an interest in professional cuddling are welcome too.

    What does "@" mean before a user name?
    An @ symbol before a user name does two things: it creates a link to the user's profile, and it notifies them that they have been mentioned in the post.

    How do I do formatting such as italic, bold face and links?
    The forums use something called Markdown. Some common formats are:
    Format Appearance
    Some *italic* text Some italic text
    Some **bold** text Some bold text
    [Cuddle Comfort]( link Cuddle Comfort link
    Profile of @respectful Profile of @respectful
    ### Third level header (see below)

    Third level header

    How do I link to a post?
    Clicking on the date at the start of a post gives you the address of that comment, which you can link to like this:

    [The lighter side](

    ... which gets displayed as: The lighter side.

    The date in the first post of a discussion is a link to the whole thread. It can end with "#latest" to link to the end of the thread, or "/p1" (page one) to link to the start:

    Can I edit or delete my posts?
    Posts remain editable for a little while, but they can't be deleted. If you want to remove a post, edit it and replace it with some other text.

    Is there a way to find all posts from a user?
    The following method is unsupported, so might change without warning. Remember that a user's comments are just a snapshot and may be easy to misinterpret out of context, and might not represent them accurately as a person.

    Add a user name after the following URL to see that person's posts:

    For example:

    To go beyond the first page, add "?page=p2" etc. to the end:

    What has been discussed on the forums already?
    The Cuddling Discussions and Resources thread is a summary of past discussions by topic.

    Are there some topics to avoid?
    Some topics are against the spirit of the site, such as a focus on sexuality.

    Promoting things that are against the Terms of Service may result in a ban. The Terms of Service also forbid harassment, hateful posts, spam and advertising material.

    A few topics may get a reaction of "We've talked about this already!", even if the question is genuine. Examples include "What if you get aroused while cuddling?" or "Why do professionals charge so much?" (see elsewhere in this FAQ for answers).

    Off topic posts are OK (e.g. What are you doing right now?), but the forums are mostly a place for like minded people to discuss cuddling; having too many unrelated posts can be a distraction for some people.

    How do I report an inappropriate post?
    If you see a post on the forum that is derogatory, sexually oriented or otherwise inappropriate, you can report it by clicking on Flag at the top right of the post. Alternatively, message one of the forum admins @reurbo or @SoulcuddlerZ with your concerns.

    How do I get started on the forum?
    The forums are a great way to get to know other cuddlers and feel like part of the community. You could start by posting in one of these threads:

    How did people pick their user names?
    Cuddling experiences

    Or take a look through the Cuddling Discussions and Resources to see what has been discussed before. Feel free to revive an old thread if you have something to add to it.
  • How do I find people in my local area

  • [Deleted User]galowglass (deleted user)
    edited September 2018

    You'll find that in the General section (in this post), under "How does this work". Peace

  • [Deleted User]stockman76 (deleted user)

    Can you delete your own posts?

  • @stockman76 "Can you delete your own posts?"

    Good question; added to the last section.

  • I just signed up and already have a request to meet but the client is requesting my phone number is this ok?

  • edited September 2020

    @RWard "the client is requesting my phone number is this ok?"

    Added "Should I be concerned if someone wants to talk off site?" to the end of the Messages section.

  • [Deleted User]cuppancuddles (deleted user)

    When filling out profile it doesn't save because
    "Lat field is required
    Ing field is required"
    I've filled all the fields so what's that?

  • edited October 2018

    @cuppancuddles That's to do with your location. It's best to use a city name like London rather than a country or state name, otherwise searching for nearby cuddlers won't be very accurate (and other people might have difficulty finding you too).

  • edited October 2018

    @cuppancuddles It's happening because you are always required to select a location from the suggestion list after clicking 'Change Location'. It's related to Google API and does admittedly need some improvement on our end.

    Even if you enter exactly the same text as one of the suggestions, you'll still need to instead click it from the list.

  • @respectful
    Just an update, I am moving my blog to Will be private for the next couple days while I get it settled again, then it will be up. I didn't intend to do this till January but I see some banned folks from elsewhere on the internet are contacting me through it and pretending to be other people again...eyeroll

  • Is this website available as an app?

  • How do I get my profile from being able to be googled using my user name? I only want my user name to be searched internally. Not from google. I've changed account settings several days ago. But haven't had anything change. Thanks

  • edited December 2018

    Settings > Privacy > Block public visitors & Google? > Yes

    That will ask Google to not index your profile page in the form of a noindex meta tag. If Google is already indexing your profile, it can take days/weeks for them to notice your request and remove it.

  • But it will eventually?

  • Yes, according to Google and in my experience.

  • Hi there! How do i reactivate my professional cuddling account? Thanks!

  • @RitaNR Just login again and it should re-activate.

  • It hasn't from what I see... When I look to view my profile, it still shows its been deactivated...

  • Nevermind, after I changed my password it needed me to log out and then log back in. I got it to work! Thank you!!!!! ?

  • Anybody else having trouble with search settings on mobile :/ Don’t know where else to post this

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