MadameLorelei

I am a Jill of all trades with a ton of interesting life experiences behind me. Always happy to entertain. I have more hobbies than any one person should rightfully be allowed. I do anything from woodworking to home improvement to trapeze, contortionism. Pole dancing,fire dancing, hoop dance, etc.

I've been a bartender, an EMT, an auditor, a dancer, an entertainer, an advanced pole instructor, a fire performer, a network support tech, an applications systems analyst... I was working in a machine shop in HVAC while working on automating the business end.

These days I'm rebuilding a fire-damaged house, spending more time than I'd like under the hood of my truck(s), and working on some of my mad engineering projects - I'm always up to something. :)

It's a long story, but I'm at war with the city over my house. They tried to demolish it, but I fought them and won and they've been retaliating. Long story short, they dug up and capped off my water and sewer lines and want me to pay like $25,000 to put them back, so I do not have running water. I don't have a working bathroom, so I either have to go to you or rent a room from my neighbor if I must host.